To be With You
by H-Mira
Summary: As Hitsugaya watches Hinamori sleep beside him, he starts to remember all the times they had spent together... The journey that had brought them to where they are today. "Because to be with you, there is nothing that I wouldn't do." HitsuHina
1. Chapter 1: When we first met

**Welcome to _To be With You_!**

 **I know I already have one other fanfic on the go, but I just really wanted to get a start on this one.**

 **This story will basically be Hitsugaya remembering his life with Hinamori. I plan on covering all major developments in their relationship from his point of view. Also, just in case it isn't obvious enough, he's telling their life story to Hinamori as she sleeps.**

 **Disclaimer:**

 ** _When things are written in Italic_ , that is when Hitsugaya is making a comment from his present day self. When things are simply written normally, it's depicting an event that took place in the past.**

 **Anyway, please enjoy!**

* * *

Chapter 1: When we first met

 _It was late. In fact, it was_ really _late. As I looked outside through my bedroom window, I could already make out the faint outline of the sunrise as it began to make its way over the Seireitei. Sighing, I shake my head. With only a few hours left before I have to get up and start my day, I really should try to get at least some sleep._

 _As I'm about to close my eyes once again, I hear the sound of someone stirring beside me. I gently smile to myself as I look over at the person beside me. There, sleeping peacefully next to me, is my childhood friend Hinamori Momo._

 _Looking back, we've gone through quite a lot to get to where we are today. Happy times, sad times… It seems as though we've been through it all. In fact, I can remember it all far too well, just as though we only just met for the first time the other day…_

* * *

 _Flashback, the day I first saw you_

It was a day that felt like just any other. We had just run out of rice, so my grandmother had asked me to go to town to go buy some. She was too feeble to make the journey to town and back with a bag of rice by herself, so I offered to do it in her place.

Although I was quick to offer to go in her place, deep down I hated going into town. It wasn't so much that I hated the town itself, it just that I hated the looks I would get whenever I was there. The people there, even the adults, wouldn't make any attempt to hide the contempt they felt for me as well as for my white hair and turquoise eyes.

Although it was bad enough dealing with the adults, it was even worst with the other children. While the adults would settle for simply giving me dirty looks, that wasn't enough for the kids. No, they felt the need to either run away from me or torment me and call me names. Fortunately, most kids simply choose to run away. However, there were still a few who felt like I should have to pay for being so different.

Because of how harsh I knew some of the kids could be, I decided to take a detour on my way to town. It wasn't really much of a detour, it was just a longer route into town, but it did go around the playground where I knew the other kids would be at this time of day, so I decided it was best to go this way rather than the shorter way.

As I walked into town, I noticed that there weren't very many people around. This was rather odd, since it was in the middle of the day, but I didn't ponder too much on it. After all, with less people around, there would be less gazes to endure.

Once I purchased the necessary rice, I noticed that there happen to be some peaches on sale. Ordinarily, they were way too expensive to buy, but since they were on sale that day, I figured I may as well buy a couple with some of the leftover money I had. Satisfied with my purchases, I decided to make my way back up the path that I had taken to get to town in the first place.

While I was on my way back up the hill home, I happened to notice someone staring off into space in one of the forest clearings. Half intrigued as to whom it may be, I stopped walking and turned my head around to get a better look at whoever this person could be.

And low and behold, that person was you.

There you were, just staring off into space as you took in the world around you. With your pigtails and your ragged brown clothes, you looked in awe as you stared at the space before you, almost as though it was your first time seeing it. Then it dawned on me that it probably was your first time seeing it.

 _She must have just gotten here_ I remembered thinking as I watched you. Then, almost as though you could hear my thoughts, you turned and looked my way.

As you looked at me, I noticed your eyes widen. It could have been because of my appearance, or maybe it was because I was the first actual person you had seen since your soul was transferred over from the world of the living. Either way, once your gaze met mine, it refused to look anywhere else. Then, almost as though you felt something calling out to you, you took a step towards me.

Seeing you make your way towards me caused me to panic. Usually, whenever people would see me for the first time, they would either run away and/or look at me with disgust. Yet, you looked at me with the same awe filled expression you had as you took in your surroundings earlier. Not knowing how to process this, I immediately turned away and began to run up the hill back home.

"Wait, don't go! Please don't go!" I heard you cry out from behind me. Surprised to hear you call out to me, I stopped running and turned around to look back at you. I saw you desperately trying to catch up to me as you ran as fast as you could behind me. Once you finally caught up to me, you took a moment to catch your breath. While you were doing this, I merely stared at you, shocked that not only had you not run away from me, but you even called after me when I ran away from you.

Having finally caught your breath, you lifted your head to face me. I remember you looking at me for a moment before speaking, as though you were trying to take in the entirety of my appearance. Then, you spoke. "Excuse me," you said as you looked me directly in the eye "but do you know where we are?"

"We're in Jurinan, the first district of Rokongai. If you go down that path, you'll reach the town" I told you as you nodded your head in response. However, it was clear by the look on your face that you had no idea what I was talking about. Sighing, I pointed back down the path towards town. "Go that way" I said with an annoyed tone.

"O-Oh, okay" you replied as you looked the way I was pointing. Satisfied that you had understood, I lowered my arm and turned back around as I began to walk home once again.

"W-Wait, where are you going?" you exclaimed shortly after I began to walk away.

"Home" I bluntly replied without even stopping or turning around to look you. "You should head back home, too" I added shortly afterwards as an afterthought.

"Home…" I heard you whisper to yourself. Then it dawned on me that you didn't yet have a home to return to. Slowing down, I eventually stopped and turned around to face you once more. "Look, um, you'll be able to find a home if you go that way, alright? Someone like you shouldn't have any trouble finding a family to take you in." I said as I looked back at you.

You simply nodded in response, with your mood still being as a sad as it was a moment before. "Okay, I guess I'll go that way then…" you muttered as you gazed sadly at the ground. However, despite what you said, you made no effort to head towards the town below. Instead, you merely stood planted in place as your gaze was focused on the ground at your feet.

* * *

 _Had it been anyone else, I probably would have just done nothing in response and went back home. Yet, for some reason, I just couldn't seem to do that to you. Even now, I'm not too sure why I did what I did. Maybe it was because of how sad you looked? Maybe it was because you didn't seem to be afraid of me? Or maybe, just maybe, it was because I sensed that there was something about you that made you different,_ special _. In any event, I'm forever thankful for what I did that day, because it tied my fate to you._

* * *

"H-Here, take this" I stuttered as I handed you one of the peaches I had bought. "C-Cheer up, will you? It's not like it's the end of the world. You'll be able to find a family to take you in, I promise. So just don't cry, okay?"

"Y-You really mean it?" you muttered in response as you looked wide eyed at me. "You promise?"

"Yeah, yeah, I promise. So just take this and stop crying, okay?" I replied with my hand stretched out towards you. You then took the peach from my hand and took a bite out of it.

"Hmm, this is so good!" you exclaimed as you happily ate the peach. "Thank you so much for giving me one! You're so nice!" you added as you smiled brightly at me.

I remember feeling the temperature in my cheeks rise at your comment. No one, besides my grandmother, had ever thanked me before, let alone praise me for being kind. And yet, here you were, doing both of those things after only having known me for a few minutes. Truth be told, I didn't know how to process this. So, I did what I had always done when people talked to me: I tried to shrug it off.

"W-Whatever. Just head on to town already, alright?" I stuttered with my arms crossed over my chest as I tried to regain my infamous cold demeanor. I had made it a point to look off to the side since I didn't want you to see just how much your comment had affected me.

"Alright, if you say so!" you exclaimed in response before beginning to happily make your way to the town below. "See you around!" you added as you waved back at me before disappearing out of sight.

 _Yeah, see you around_ I remember thinking as you disappeared from my line of sight. Once you were gone, I finished making my way back home.

* * *

 _I remember that, at the time, I wasn't very hopeful that you would still want to see me after getting to know the other kids in town. I guess I just figured that you'd cast me aside once a better alternative was presented to you._

 _Boy, am I glad about how wrong I was._


	2. Chapter 2: Welcoming you home

**Well, I'm back with another chapter!**

 **I know I just posted chapter one yesterday, but after reading some of the reviews that were saying anxiously some of you were waiting for an update, I just had to oblige! Plus, I already knew what I wanted to do for chapter 2, so I also really wanted to get the second chapter out there.**

 **Anyway, please enjoy!**

 **~ H-Mira**

* * *

Chapter 2: Welcoming You Home

 _And for the next few days after I first met you, the words you spoke to me just refused to leave my mind. It seemed like despite having convinced myself that you had forgotten all about me, I just couldn't forget about you._

* * *

 _Flashback, getting to know you_

It had been a few days after our first encounter when my grandmother decided it was time to run into town once more. She had recently started feeling pains in her lower back and wanted to get some medicine from the local doctors. I remember that it wasn't a serious pain, though it did still warrant a trip into town. So, the two of us decided to head into town.

A part of me had wanted to take the longer path into town. After all, it was pretty deserted most of the time, so we wouldn't have had to worry about running into anyone else. Though I told myself that was the reason I wanted to take that path into town, I knew deep down that I wished to see if perhaps you were still there, waiting for me to come back. However, I knew that my grandmother couldn't afford to take the long way into town due to her back injury, so I suffered silently along with her as we made our way down the shorter path.

Once we had arrived in town, I remember noticing just how packed the town was on that particular day. I remember thinking that everyone must have decided to take care of their errands on the same day. _Just my luck_ I had thought at the time as I surveyed the crowd around me.

Then, as my gaze had shifted towards the lot where the other children frequently played, there you were, happily playing along with the other kids in a game that involved kicking a ball around.

As soon as I saw you, I just couldn't look away. So, I simply watched you play with the other kids, just as though you were merely one of them. As I was watching you, a small part of me wanted you to notice me in the midst of the crowd of adults surrounding the medicine stalls. However, at the time, I remember thinking that it was a pointless thought. After all, what were the odds of you spotting me?

Then, just as though you felt the need to challenge my thought, you turned and looked directly my way. As our gazes locked again, I was filled with both hope and dread. On one hand, I had been wanting to see you again since our first encounter. But, on the other, I didn't want to have to see your once bright smile turn into a contempt filled gaze, a result of adopting the attitudes of those you now surrounded yourself with. So, not wanting to endure the agony of the latter option, I suddenly began to run towards the path back home. While I knew at the time that I shouldn't have left my grandmother without telling her where I was going, I just didn't care. I just had to get away.

* * *

 _Later, once my grandmother had gotten home, I remember her scolding me harshly for leaving her like that, saying how worried she was about me. I had merely nodded in response as I took the scolding I deserved. Yet, the whole time I sat there obediently trying to listen to her, my thoughts kept drifting to you and the expression you had on your face when you saw me again. Therefore, as I was receiving my punishment, all I could picture was your emotionless face as you stared back at me._

* * *

The next few times I had to go to town, I had made it a point to avoid the playground. However, that didn't stop me from seeing you. It seemed like regardless of wherever I went at the time, you were just a corner away. And every time our eyes would meet, I would simply run away.

And that day was no different. I had spotted you as I was buying some sewing materials for my grandmother. Once I had locked gazes with yours, I had immediately turned away as I quickly paid for the materials and began to run back home.

* * *

 _And, just you would, you finally got fed up with me running away from you._

* * *

As I was running towards the path back home, I could hear the sound of running footsteps behind me. Without stopping, I slightly turned my head to the side to see what was behind me. And there, out of the corner of my eye, was you running full force directly afterward me.

Panicking at the sight of you, I didn't notice the stray rock on the path in front of me. Once I had reached it, I slightly lost my footing as I tried to stop myself from tripping and falling over. And that attempt to regain my balance cost me something: my speed.

As a result, you ran straight into me, sending the both of us toppling over each other. Once my head had finally hit the ground and stopped moving, I looked up to see you happily grinning down at me as you pinned me to the ground.

"Looks like I finally caught you, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as you graced me with a bright smile.

* * *

 _At the time, I remember being too stunned to be able to formulate a reply right away. This was because of two reasons. The first was because you were suddenly pinning me to the ground, something I had never experienced before. And the second was because…_

* * *

"S-S-Shiro-chan!?" I had managed in response as the blood rose to my cheeks. "W-Wha- What. Who. Huh?!"

"Well, Shiro-chan is you, silly." you replied as the smile on your face grew. "Isn't it cute? I came up with it myself! And it definitely suits you!" you added as you removed one of your hands off the ground so you could run it through my hair.

"I-I'm not cute!" I had stuttered back as I tried to pull off a menacing glare, but failed miserably. "So don't call me Shiro-chan!"

"Then what else am I supposed to call you?" you asked as you placed you hand back on the ground and tilted your head slightly to the side in confusion.

"My name's Hitsugaya Toshiro! And would you get off me?!" I stated as I tried desperately to push you off me. Unfortunately, since you were about a head taller than me at the time, you were also a lot stronger than me. So all the attempts I had made to push you off of me were moot.

"Okay!" you exclaimed as you happily jumped off of me and stood up. "Hmm, Hitsugaya Toshiro, huh… Well, I like Shiro-chan better, so I'm going to keep calling you that!"

"W-What? No!" I shouted in response as I sat up and shot a glare at you. A glare which you simply shrugged off.

"My name's Hinamori, by the way. Hinamori Momo" you said as you ignored my complaints about the nickname you had given me. "It's nice to officially meet you, Shiro-chan" you added as you faced me with a smile.

I frowned in response to the nickname. "I said don't call me that! My name's Hitsugaya-" I had begun in response, but you simply ignored me as you went to collect the scattered sewing material that had fallen from my bag when we fell.

"Here you go, Shiro-chan" you said as you handed me the materials. "You should really be more careful."

"I wouldn't have had to be careful if you wouldn't have tackled me…" I had mumbled in response as I took the materials from you and stuffed them in the bag once again.

"Ah, I guess you're right. Silly me" you replied as you laughed a little to yourself. "Well, I guess you have to go home now, huh? Say hi to your Oba-san for me!" you added before beginning to run back into town. "See you around, Shiro-chan!" you called back with a wave as you continued to run.

"Who says I want to see you again…" I grumbled in response as I watched you run away. "And don't call me Shiro-chan!"

However, you were already too far away to hear my response. Sighing, I decided to continue on my way home. And as I walked home, it took all I could to stop myself from letting loose a smile.

* * *

 _I remember that I saw you almost every day after that. I also remember my grandmother finding my sudden interest in going into town odd because I would always give her the same excuse of having to buy something. Since there was only so much the two of us needed at the time, it was obvious that I was making unnecessary trips into town. However, my grandmother never once commented on my new-found interest in the town below. Looking back, I'm sure a part of her knew why I kept going into town every day. Yet, my young self still manage to convince himself that Oba-san was none the wiser to my true motives._

 _And that's how I spent the following weeks, running into town every chance I got so I could go and see you. Sure, the other children would be there too, but I found it a lot easier to ignore their stares when you were around. Even back then, you still managed to lighten my load. Really, I don't know what I would have done had I not met you back then…_

 _Anyway, the following weeks unfolded without any particularly noteworthy occurrences. And, as the time went on, I eventually introduced you to my grandmother. You two got along right from the start. I remember that, at the time, I found it odd how I had never seen you with any parents or adult figures of your own. While it was just a passing thought at the time, I eventually truly started to wonder about your family._

 _And then, on that day, I finally got my answer._

* * *

"Hey, Hinamori, pass the ball this way!" I called out to you as our team was running towards the goal. The two of us, as well as the other neighbourhood kids, were currently playing a game that was similar to what I now know to be called soccer. At the time, both teams were tied with one goal left to decide the victorious team.

"Okay!" you yelled back as you passed the ball to me. Once the ball was within my grasp, I easily outplayed the other players and scored the winning goal.

As I had turned to face you with our victory, you suddenly ran right into me and engulfed me into a back breaking hug. "That was so cool, Shiro-chan! You were amazing!" you exclaimed in my ear as my face began to redden at the sudden physical contact.

Then, as though to save me the embarrassment of trying to reply, one of our teammates called out from the sidelines. "Hey, check this out! I think someone's living in the bush!" they yelled as they motioned towards the woods surrounding the playground.

I remember feeling you stiffen at their comment. Yet, being the kid that I was, I thought nothing of it and simply broke free from your embrace before making my way towards the other kids.

Sure enough, once I could see what they were referring to, I had to admit that someone was probably living there. As I examine the small clearing, I remember noticing a rugged old blanket, a pillow, and some garbage in the corner by a tree. Too caught up in curiously examining the scene in front of me, I didn't notice you quietly approach me from behind.

"Wow, what kind of loser lives here!?" one of the kids remarked as they looked at the clearing in disgust.

"I know right!?" another had said in response.

"Hey! Let's tear the place up to teach this loser a lesson!" a third kid stated as he picked up the blanket and began to rip it apart. Seeing the kid start to partake in the destruction of the site, it didn't take long for the other children to join in. Not being one myself to engage in something to petty, I just shrugged as I turned to look at you beside me. Once I saw the look on your face, I just knew what I had to do.

"Hey! Stop it!" I yelled at the other children as they suddenly stopped what they were doing. "As crappy as this place is, it's still somebody's home! So just leave it alone!"

"And if we don't?" one kid replied with smug expression on his face. "What are you going to do about it, _Shiro-chan_?"

* * *

 _Oh, even thinking back, that snot snoozed kid still manages to make my blood boil. Fortunately, even back then, I wasn't one to take shit from someone like that._

* * *

Filled with a sudden rage, I went straight up to the kid and punched him directly across the face, knocking him to the ground as a result. Seeing that I was serious about not messing with this place, the other kids were quick to drop what they were doing and run off. Once the kid I had punched recovered from the impact of my blow, he too stood up and ran away.

As soon as they were out of sight, I had turned to face you. "This place was your home… Wasn't it?" I said as I gestured to the clearing below my feet.

You had simply nodded in response. I could tell just how embarrassed you were of this by the fact that you refused to meet my gaze.

 _It looks like your home's been torn to shreds_ I had thought as I looked at the damage the other kids had caused. While I had eventually intervened, they had still managed to do quite a number on the place.

Looking up at you once again, I could make out the faint sparkle of a tear as it made its way down your cheek.

* * *

 _Even back then, I hated the sight of you in tears. I remember thinking, even then, that I would do whatever it took to stop those tears from falling. And it was with that thought in mind that I came to the following decision._

* * *

"Come live with me and Oba-san" I suddenly blurted out. Seeming to register what I said, you lifted your tear filled gaze towards mine.

"R-Really?" you had doubtfully asked as you closely examined my face. "A-Are you sure?"

While I did have doubts at the time whether or not it was a good idea to suggest such a thing, those doubts evaporate when I saw your desperate face. "Y-Yeah, I'm sure." I stuttered in response as I tried to play my offer off as though it were no big deal. "Oba-san really likes you, so I'm sure she'd be happy to have you around."

"And what about you…?" you muttered as your gaze never once left my face.

"W-Well, I mean…" I began as I ran one of my hands through my hair. "I-It's not like I mind you being around or anything…"

"So then I really can come live with you two? Is that really okay, Shiro-chan?" you asked once again in disbelief.

"Yeah, yeah, it's alright" I answered before taking your small hand in mine. "So let's go home, okay?" Nodding, you followed me as I brought you back home for the first time.


	3. Chapter 3: The Shinigami Encounter

**Welcome to the third chapter!**

 **From this point on, it will get a little sad. But don't worry, I'll make sure to give it a happy ending!**

 **Also, I want to personally thank those of you who took the time to review. I really do love reading what you all think of my story!**

 **And in regards to the mysterious guest reviewer who said that I made them start to ship HitsuHina, thank you so much for the wonderful compliment. To hear that even someone who didn't originally like the pairing is enjoying this fanfic... Wow, your review made my day. And don't feel bad about giving a longer review! Longer reviews simply allow me to indulge in your thoughts for that much longer, after all.**

 **To everyone else who also took the time to review, I am really happy to have heard your thoughts as well! Hearing you all enjoy this fanfic really makes me want to continue updating it!**

 **Anyway, without further delay, please enjoy chapter three!**

* * *

Chapter 3: The Shinigami Encounter

 _Now that you were living with us, that house just felt so much more like a home. Sure, Oba-san and I had been living comfortably with just the two of us, but it was always quiet, calm. But with you around, it was like the house had suddenly taken on a new colour. You, with your bright smile and your warmth, turned our bleak house into a brightly coloured home._

 _And that was how we lived, for years on end, just the three of us. Yeah, you did have your other friends that you would see from time to time, but you always seemed just that much happier whenever you were at home with us… With me. And no, I'm not being bias._

… _. Well, okay, maybe I'm being a little bias, but just a little._

 _Regardless, it seemed that the three of us had our happy little family. I remember being so sure back then that the three of us would just stay that way forever…._

 _But then you decided to leave us…. To leave me… All alone, once again._

* * *

 _Flashback, and then you left_

"Man, I'm tired. Can we _please_ take a break? _Please_?" one of the neighbourhood kids pleaded as he sat himself down in the middle of the playground. You, me, and the some of the other children had been in the middle of playing a game of kickball when that kid just decided to stop playing. I remember it being a particularly hot day, so we all were pretty happy with the excuse to sit down. Looking back, I'm sure that everyone had wanted to take a break, but no one wanted to be the first to admit that they needed one. Fortunately, that one kid saved us all the trouble of hurting our pride.

"What should we do now?" you had asked as you sat yourself down as well. After all, we still had a few hours to kill before having to go back home.

"Hmm, what should we do…" one of the other kids ponder in response as we all followed your lead and sat down as well. We all sat together in silence as the other kids tried to think of something to do.

 _How about we just go home?_ I had thought at the time as I shot you a quick glance.

* * *

 _Sure, the other kids were no longer avoiding me, but it was still pretty obvious that they didn't like having me around. And the feeling was definitely mutual. The only reason why we even put up with each other was because of you. They, just like me, had grown to like you and enjoy your company. But, because you had made sure that we were a package deal, they had to put up with me being around too._

* * *

"Oh, I know!" one boy exclaimed as he had broken us all from our thoughts. "Hey, have you guys ever heard about the things called _Hollows_?"

"Hollows? What's a Hollow?" you had innocently asked as you tilted your head to the side in confusion.

"I heard from my Aniki that Hollows are monsters that roam the world of the living" that boy had continued as everyone was now directing their attention towards him. "He said that they're huge beasts with big black bodies and white masks over their faces. And that every night, when good souls like us are sleeping, these Hollows come out. And when they find us…" he paused for a moment for dramatic effect "They kill and eat us!" he yelled as his hand made out the motions of slashing claws.

"AHH!" a few of the kids had exclaimed in fright. However, neither of us had been one of the few. We had both sat in silence as we continued to look at the boy who was telling the story. Eventually, you spoke again.

"B-But, Hollows are only in the world of the living, right? So they can't get us here?" you had shyly asked the boy. I remember noticing a hint of fear in your voice as you spoke. Now, it wasn't as much fear as what the other kids were feeling, but it was there nonetheless.

"Oh, well, I guess I forgot to mention," that kid began a smug smile dominated his face. "Hollows can also come here, too."

I had frowned in response. "But you just said that they're monsters in the world of the living. Not monster in the Soul Society" I replied. At this, I remember seeing that boy panic as a result of not wanting to lose the power he had gained by scaring everyone with his tale.

"W-Well they come here, too!" he had shouted back as he tried to defend himself. "I just forgot to add that part, is all!"

"Sure, you did…" I had muttered just loud enough for everyone to hear. This had caused that boy's face to burn red as he glared at me. Ignoring him, I turned to face you. "Anyway, let's go home, Hinamori. It's getting pretty boring here."

You had simply nodded in response. Satisfied that you were coming too, I began to walk back home with you following behind me.

* * *

 _I remember not thinking much of the boy's tale at the time. To me, it just seemed pretty obvious that he was only trying to scare us. So, I had just brushed him and his story off as we walked back home._

 _It was probably because of how unaffected I was by the story that I failed to notice just how much it had affected you. That is, until later on that evening…_

* * *

I remember being woken up in the middle of the night by the sound of you and Oba-san whispering to each other as something was being dragged across the floor. Being too lazy and tired to see what you two were doing, I simply rolled over as I tried to fall back asleep.

"I-I'm so sorry!" I heard you say with a strong sense of embarrassment in your voice. "I'm so, so sorry!"

"Shh, you'll wake up Toshiro, my dear." my grandmother had replied as she tried to calm you down. "And it's alright. You were just scared, is all. And it's normal for kids to wet the bed when they're scared. So there's nothing to be ashamed of."

Now that had woken me up. Slowly, I sat myself up and turned to look at both of you. There, in the middle of the room, was you and Oba-san standing opposite of each other. Looking down, I noticed Oba-san carrying your futon in her arms. While it was hard to tell with the lack of sight, I remember still being able to make out a faint dark puddle on it.

"Y-You wet the bed?" I had suddenly asked, causing the two of you to notice that I was awake for the first time. "You _actually_ wet the bed?"

* * *

 _Oh, the look on your face when you realized I was awake… That's one look I'll never forget._

* * *

"S-S-Shiro-chan?" you stuttered as you looked back at me with a mortified expression on your face. "Y-You're awake?"

"Of course, I'm awake." I replied. "You're bed-wetting woke me up."

* * *

 _You had said nothing in response as your face became a scarlet colour. It was obvious, even back then, that you really hadn't wanted me to know about your bed-wetting. Looking back, I don't blame you, considering how I acted in response._

 _Being the little brat that I was, there was only really one logical thing for me to do at the time: laugh. And boy, did I laugh_ hard _._

* * *

"You actually wet the bed!" I exclaimed in a fit of laughter. "I can't believe you actually wet the bed!"

Since you were too mortified to speak, Oba-san replied in your place. "Now, Toshiro, that's not nice. Momo was just scared. And when kids get scared, they sometimes wet the bed. So don't go making fun of her."

"Oh, don't you go defending that bed-wetter!" I answered as I continued to laugh. Then, reflecting on what I had just said, I paused for a second. "Hmm, bed-wetter Momo… Now that _does_ have a nice ring to it."

As though you had realized what had just crossed my mind, you finally spoke. "No! Don't you dare, Shiro-"

"Now, now, that's not very nice, _Bed-wetter"_ I interrupted with a smug look on my face. "You have a nickname for _me_ , so it's only fair that I have one for _you_."

"No! Please, Shiro-chan! Anything but that!" you had desperately pleaded in response.

I just smirked back at you. "Have a good night, _Bed-wetter Momo"_ I replied before turning around and falling back asleep.

* * *

 _And that night marked the birth of Bed-wetter Momo._

 _Looking back, that really was a mean nickname to give you. As much as I didn't like being called Shiro-chan, a part of me still knew it was a way that you expressed your affection towards me. But, being the little brat that I was, I was too caught in how embarrassing the nickname was to realize that it really wasn't that bad in the first place._ _Not that I'd ever tell you that when you're awake, mind you._

 _Anyway, it didn't take long for that night to end and for the next day to arrive. And that day marked the beginning of the end of our happy little family._

* * *

"Hey, Shiro-chan, wait up! You're going too far!" I heard you plea from behind me. Being the little adventurer that I was, I had decided to go exploring the forest surrounding our house. And you, not wanting to be left alone, desperately followed after me.

"Hurry up, will you?" I called back as I continued my way through the forest and up the hill. "There's a clearing just ahead that I want to check out."

"But _Shiro-chan_ …" I heard you whine as you were trying to catch your breath.

"It's just a little further, _Bed-wetter_. You can make it" I replied. I remember hearing you mutter something unintelligible to yourself in response. And, due to the annoyed tone of your voice, I had a feeling it something along the lines of being displeased with your newly acquired nickname. That thought caused me to smirk as I reached the clearing.

"Wow, is that a cave?" I heard you exclaim over my shoulder as you finally caught up to me. "That's so cool!"

I had said nothing in response as I surveyed the area. It was merely a small open field in front of a cave that lead into the mountain. _This is it? I walked all the way up here for this?_ I had thought as I looked around in disappointment.

While I was disappointed with what we had found, you were ecstatic. Walking on ahead of me, you looked at your surroundings in awe as you advanced towards the cave. "Hey, Shiro-chan, isn't this place great?" I heard you ask as I was still looking around our new environment.

"Well, I guess it's-" I began but then stopped as all the blood drained from my face. Now that I was looking directly at you, I was able to see the Hollow that lurked inside the cave. While we had only just yesterday been described what a Hollow looked like, I knew right away that the monster behind you had to be one. That large black body and white mask was undeniable.

"Hmm? What's with the face, Shiro-chan?" you asked me as your bright smile began to turn into a frown. After seeming to realize that I was staring at something behind you, you slowly turned around.

Seeing the hollow creep up towards you, you had stood frozen in place from fear. I watched in horror as the beast came closer and closer to you. Once the hollow had finally reached you, it let out an ear shattering scream as it pulled back one of its arms in preparation to attack you.

"MOMO!" I yelled as I finally broke free of my trance and ran towards you. Even as I rushed forwards, I already knew that I wouldn't make it in time.

But then, just before the claws reached you, a figure in a black robe blocked the attack with a sword and sent the hollow flying backwards. Screaming in frustration, the Hollow charged towards the black robed figure, only to be cut in two as their sword made contact with the beast once again.

* * *

 _At the time, I couldn't have cared less about the battle between the Shinigami and the Hollow. Of course, I was thankful that the Shinigami had protected you, but once you were out of immediate danger, my thoughts were solely focused on getting to you and making sure you were alright. Because of this, I didn't even register the battle that went on. All I remember is that the hollow attacked and the Shinigami won. And that, after scolding us for wandering into a hollow infested area, the shinigami continued on their way._

 _You, on the other hand, had been mesmerized as you watched in awe the Shinigami defeat the hollow. As I was running towards you, I remember faintly registering the fire in your eyes as you watched the battle progress. And I know that it was that fire that lead you to your declaration the following evening._

* * *

"Shiro-chan, I'm going to become a Shinigami" you stated as we watched the sunset overtake the town below. You then turned to look at me with a determined look in your eyes. "I swear it, I will become a Shinigami."

* * *

 _I don't remember what we said to each other after that. In fact, I don't even know if I said anything at all in response. All I remember is the sense of dread building inside of me._

 _It was not long after that day that you took and passed the Shinigami entrance exam._

 _And then, with your acceptance letter in hand, you left..._


	4. Chapter 4: Without You

Chapter 4: Without You 

_Back then, you were like a summer breeze. With you in my life, it felt like I was suddenly engulfed in a warm breeze. Being surrounded by your warmth and kindness, it felt like my eternal winter had finally begun to turn into spring._

 _But, just like a summer breeze, you were too good to last. And, just like a summer breeze, you were quick to come ... And quick to go._

 _When you left, I didn't know what to do anymore. I had grown so use to your constant presence that I didn't know how to live life without you anymore. Sure, you would visit during your school breaks, but it wasn't the same. And I know that you felt the impact of the distance between us too._

 _It just felt as though I was no longer a part of your life... As though I was left behind..._

* * *

 _Flashback, getting by without you_

"Alright, I have to get going now, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as you ran one of your hands through my hair. "I know you'll miss me, but I'll be back soon!"

"Who would miss a bed-wetter like you..." I retorted as I glared back at you. "And stop calling me Shiro-chan!" I added as I brushed your hand from my hair.

"Tell you what," you replied with a smirk "I'll call you by your last name when you come to the same grown up school as me. I know you have spiritual pressure, Shiro-chan, I can sense it. So you'd definitely be able to get in if you tried!"

"Who'd want to go to a stupid school like that?" I answered with frown. "And I shouldn't have to go to some school just to make you stop calling me by such a stupid nickname!"

"It s not stupid..." you had pouted in response. "I like the name Shiro-chan! It's really cute!"

"Exactly! And I'm not cute, so stop calling me that!" I yelled with the same scowl on my face.

You had begun to giggle at me in response. "You know," you began between small fits of laughter "you are pretty cute when you say that."

"S-S-SHUT UP!" I barked back as I turn my head slightly to the side in an attempt to hide my reddening cheeks. "Aren't you supposed to be leaving!?"

"AHH! You're right!" you exclaimed as you suddenly remembered why we were even having this exchange in the first place. Then, with a quick little jump, you set off running down the path towards the shinigami academy. "See you later, Shiro-chan!" you called back with a wave as you disappeared further and further out of sight.

"Don't bother coming back, Bed-wetter Momo!" I had yelled after you as I watched you run off. It hadn't taken long before you were completely out of sight.

* * *

 _I still remember exactly how you looked as you ran off. Like an image destined to remain on a wall, the sight of you going off without me will forever be burned into my memories._

 _What I remember most about watching you run off was that you never once looked back at me... As though it never crossed your mind that you were leaving me alone once again..._

* * *

"Toshiro, come inside dear. You'll catch cold" my grandmother had called out to me from inside the house.

* * *

 _While I had heard her, I just couldn't remove myself from where I currently stood, nor could I look away from the spot you had been just seconds before. At the time, it had felt like if I gave in and went in inside, it was the same as though I was accepting that you were gone once again. And, I knew, once I looked away and went back inside, all I could do was wait until you came again._

* * *

Almost as though she could read my thoughts, my grandmother had come outside and placed a hand on my shoulder. "I miss her too, dear. I miss her too" she had said to me in a soothing voice.

"Why did she have to go to that stupid school anyway..." I muttered as I continued to stare at the last place I saw you. "...Were we just not good enough for her?"

"No, Toshiro, no. That's not it and you know it" Oba-san replied as she began to rub my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me. "She just... Well, she just needs to spread her wings and live her own life. And while I may be fine living out the rest of my days in Jurinan, she wasn't." She then paused for a moment before continuing "The world is so big, Toshiro. And Momo simply felt the need to explore it. So please, don't blame yourself for that."

I remember saying nothing in response. _I know that_ I had thought to myself at the time _I know that, alright? But knowing that doesn't make it any easier to see her walk away..._

After standing like that for a few minutes longer, I finally spoke. "Let's go back inside. You're right, it is starting to get cold." I stated as I carefully removed her hand from my shoulder and made my way inside. My grandmother had followed my lead soon after.

* * *

 _The time in between your visits seem to last forever. And, as you got further along in your studies, your visits became fewer and farther in between. As much as I tried not to take that personally, I just couldn't. It felt as though you didn't care about me anymore.._ _. As though you had simply brushed me aside..._

 _And then, a few years into your studies, that day came. The day where I knew I had lost my dominant place within your heart..._

* * *

"You should have seen it, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as you happily ate the watermelon Oba-san had prepared for us earlier. "It was amazing! I've never seen someone fight like that!"

"Hmm? Is that so?" I had grumpily replied as I dove into my own piece of watermelon.

Not seeming to notice my lack of interest in the current subject, you continued. "Yeah, he was amazing..." you beamed with an awe filled expression on your face. "Aizen-Taichou..." you added as your face looked full of admiration.

I remember that look just pissing me off. "What's so great about this Aizen, anyway? All he did was kill a hollow. Any old shinigami can do that much" I replied with no attempt to hide the annoyance I was feeling.

"It's Aizen- _Taichou_ , Shiro-chan!" you retorted as you pouted back at me. "Captain's work hard for their titles, so we have to call them by their titles to show proper respect!"

* * *

 _Says the one who refuses to call me by my captain's title. Honestly, I worked just as hard for it as anyone else did, you know._

* * *

"As I said, what's so great about this Aizen- _Taichou_?" I repeated as I looked back at you. Although I had emphasized the use of the captain's title to show how sarcastic I was being, you didn't seem to notice. You were merely content that I had addressed him by his title at all.

"Well, for starters," you began as admiration took hold of your face once more. "He defeated these really tough hollows as though they were nothing! Even though those same hollows had actually killed a couple of seniors, Aizen-Taichou was able to kill the hollows with only one hand! Just _one_ hand! Isn't that just incredible!?"

"But those Hollows just killed students, right? Not actual full-fledged Shinigami? So shouldn't any old shinigami have been able to defeat those hollows just as easily as he did?" I retorted with a snort.

"Well, um, I don t know... Maybe..." you faltered as you tried to think whether or not what I was suggesting was true. "But that doesn't change the fact that what he did was amazing, Shiro-chan!"

"I don't know about that" I replied as I took another bite of my watermelon. "If anyone else could have done what he did, than what he did really wasn't all that amazing, now, was it?"

You pouted once again at me in response. "You just don't get it because you weren't there" you said with a frown. "Aizen-Taichou really was amazing, Shiro-chan. And I'm sure that if you had been there, you would agree!"

"Whatever you say, Bed-wetter..." I replied as I rolled my eyes. Although I knew you had seen me roll my eyes, you didn't comment on it. At the time, I guess you simply figured that you weren't going to get an enthusiastic response out of me about your beloved captain, so there wasn't much of a point in continuing to pester me about him. So, instead, you simply settled for shooting me a quick glare before taking another bite out of your watermelon slice.

After a few moments of passed, your bright mood returned and you spoke again. "Just you wait, Shiro-chan. Someday, I'm going to be in squad five with Aizen-Taichou. Just you wait!" you exclaimed as you stared out at the sky overhead. "And when I do make it into squad five, I'll become Aizen-Taichou's vice-captain and fight along side him!"

"I didn't know they allowed bed-wetters to become vice-captains" I retorted with a smirk.

You frowned at me in response. "Oh, why do you have to be so mean sometimes, Shiro-chan?" you asked with a pout on your lips. "You should try being more like Aizen-Taichou. He's nice to _everyone_ , regardless of age or status!"

"Pssf, good for him then" I replied with a snort. "But, really, who'd want to be like that? It's so annoying being nice all the time! And besides, you know that if _I'm_ nice to someone, it's because I actually _like_ them, not because I'm _faking_ it or feel like I _have_ to be nice to them. So quit telling me to be like a wuss like him!"

"Aizen-Taichou's not a wuss, he's really strong!" you stated as your frown grew. "He's also really nice, and brave, and tall..."

* * *

 _Okay, that last one still feels like a personal insult._

* * *

You then shook your head before you got too caught up in Aizen's _greatness_. "And Shiro-chan, you're not nice to me. Does that mean you don't like me?" you added as you looked closely at me.

"Well, I, uh..." I fumbled as I tried to think of a response. "I'm nice to you sometimes... So that should be enough to know that I don't dislike you or anything..."

"Aww, I knew it! You really do like me, don't you Shiro-chan?!" you suddenly exclaimed as you pulled me into a tight embrace, not concerned at all for the watermelon juice that was now beginning to stain your clothes.

"Oi, get off of me!" I choked out as you held me tight. "I never said I liked you! I just said I don't dislike you!"

"But that's the same thing, silly!" you happily replied as you gave me another tight squeeze.

"I-I said get off me!" I repeated as the heat continued to rise in my cheeks. However, my pleas fell on deaf ears as you continued to hug me all the same.

* * *

 _Once you left the following day, you didn't come back. A year passed, and then two. And you still had yet to come back and visit._

 _Deep down, I knew it because of the goal you had set for yourself. I should have known, then, that while you were telling me about how great Aizen was, you were also telling me something else. You were saying that he was your life now, and that you would be dedicating yourself to him. And that, as a result, you were now going to be leaving me behind... for good._

 _So, it seemed, that I was to be left behind with nothing but my memories of you to keep me company..._

* * *

 **And that's chapter four!**

 **Yikes, that was a sad chapter to write. And what's worse is that I have even sadder chapters yet to come...**

 **Oh well, you all know by the first chapter that there's a happy ending, so it'll all work itself out in the end!**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing!**

 **~ H-Mira**


	5. Chapter 5: Becoming a Shinigami

Chapter 5: Becoming a Shinigami

 _A lot happened in those two years you didn't visit. At least, I know that now looking back. At the time, it felt as though time simply stood still, never advancing from the day you left. Sure, I went through and faked the normalities of everyday life as though nothing was on my mind, but deep down, I just couldn't stop thinking about the moments and memories you had left behind._

 _And that was how I lived my life for the first year you were gone. Back then, I was still holding onto the hope that you would just show up out of the blue someday with that same bright smile on your face..._

 _...But that day never came. And once that first year had passed, I knew it was time to force myself to move forward. Eventually, I was able to accept that you weren't coming back. While it had taken me a while, I even got use to living a life without you..._

 _And then Oba-san started to get sick._

 _It was a very gradual process. So gradual, I even managed to fool myself into thinking I was just imagining her worsening condition. But deep down, a part of me knew she was dying... I just didn't want to accept it._

 _Then, shortly after that, I met Matsumoto for the first time. She had told me about my overflowing reiatsu and how it was the reason Oba-san's health was failing her. When I had asked her how to save my grandmother, she had told that there was only one way: for me to become a Shinigami._

 _So, with no other choice, I packed my things and headed off to the Shinigami Academy..._

* * *

 _Flashback, following after you:_

"Now, Toshiro, do be careful" my grandmother cautioned me as we stood outside the Shinigami Academy gates. "I know that you scored the highest in this year's entrance exam, but..."

"I'll be careful, Oba-san" I replied with a slight smile on my face. "I promise." And then, after giving her a slight nod, I took off into the Academy.

"Say hi to Momo for me when you see her, Toshiro!" she called out to me as she waved me off.

 _Right, Hinamori..._ I had thought hesitantly as I turned back to acknowledge my grandmother's wave before entering the academy building.

* * *

 _As I'm sure you remember, Oba-san would send you letters and parcels while you were away at school. However, I, being the stubborn brat that I was, never even sent you a single letter. Sure, I would try to write to you sometimes, but I never had the courage to actually send you any of my letters..._

 _Anyway, because of this, I had yet to tell you about my acceptance into the Shinigami Academy. And while this was a large part of the reason why I had yet to tell you, there was another reason why I didn't tell you... It was because I didn't know how._

 _I mean, when you had initially told me to enter the academy, I merely brushed off your request with asking who in their right mind would want to go to a stupid Shinigami school. And, as it turned out in the end, I did. I wanted to go to a stupid Shinigami school._

 _While this may seem like a stupid reason for not saying anything to you, it still made me too embarrassed to tell you_

* * *

Once inside the building, I had to admit that it was as grand and as elegant as you had made it out to be all those years ago. With its large overbearing halls and its grand decoration, I couldn't help but be impressed as I made my way towards my assigned classroom.

Unfortunately, seeing as this way my first time in the building, I really had no idea where I was going. I remember trying to figure out the map given to me with my acceptance letter, but it was all to no avail. So, in a desperate attempt to make it to class on time, I decided to ask one of the seniors present for directions.

"Oh? Are you lost, little boy?" a blonde hair senior asked me as he tried to bend down to my height. "If you go back that way, you should be able to get back to the village. Or did you want some help finding your mom and dad?"

My eye started to twitch in response. While I knew I was young to be attending this academy, it still pissed me off to be mistaken for a child because of my height.

"Yo, Kira, this kid's wearing a school uniform. He's got to be one of the new students this year" a young Abarai stated as he gestured towards my uniform. "I think he's asking for direction to the first year classrooms."

"Oh! You're right!" a young Kira exclaimed as he noticed my uniform as well. "I'm sorry for mistaking you for a child. What first year classroom are you in?"

"I'm in the advanced class." I stated bluntly, eager to conclude this conversation and be on my way. I knew I was already cutting it close time wise, and I had no intentions of being late of my first day.

"Wow? The advanced class?" Kira said in surprised. "You must be pretty talented! It's nice to see bright new recruits into the academy!"

I frowned slightly in response, unpleased that I had yet to get the information I needed. "Yeah, yeah, I'm looking forward to bringing pride to the academy. Now, can you please point me in the direction of the advanced-" I began but was cut short after hearing an all too familiar voice calling out from down the hall.

"Kira-kun! Abarai-kun!" I heard you call out from down the hall behind me. "I've been looking everywhere for you two! We're gonna be late for our next class if you two don't hurry up!" you continued as I heard your steps coming closer and closer towards where I was standing.

 _Shit, I don't even know what I want to say to her yet. I can't face her now!_ I had thought as I internally began to panic. Fortunately, you had yet to recognize me, so I knew I still had some time to get myself out of the current situation unseen.

"Oh, Hinamori! We were just helping this new student here with directions!" Kira called out as he waved you over.

After taking a quick moment to internally curse Kira for his action, I turned quickly to Abarai. "So, where's the classroom? I'm gonna be late." I asked urgently in an attempt to quickly get the information I needed so I could leave.

"Just keep going down this hallway and take two lefts and a right." Abarai stated in response as he gestured to the hallway behind him and away from you. It was clear by the look on his face that he brushed off the urgency in voice for fear of not wanting to be late.

After giving him a quick nod in thanks, I quickly rushed by him in an attempt to escape unseen. As I made my way down the hallways and into the classroom, I prayed that you hadn't recognized me.

* * *

 _And, as luck would have it, you had recognized me._

* * *

As I made my way out of class at the end of the day, I was exhausted. Since I never really did much of anything during my days in Jurinan, I wasn't yet use to such full and hectic days. After letting loose a sigh, I groggily made my way towards the dorm rooms. Thankfully, I already knew where those were and didn't need to ask for directions again.

Then, after taking a few steps down the hallway, I felt a sudden presence tackle me from behind in a weird sense of déjà vue. Fortunately, I was a lot bigger and stronger than had been that day all those years ago, so I merely stumbled forward a few steps as the mysterious figure wrapped their arms around me.

"It's so nice to see you again, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed in my ear as you commenced to hug from behind. I remember that the sudden physical contact caused my internal temperature to rise.

"H-Hinamori! W-What are you doing!?" I stuttered in response as I turned my head around to face you.

"I'm hugging you, of course!" you happily replied with that bright smile of yours as you continued to embrace me. "It's just been so long since I last saw you! I'm so happy to see you again, Shiro-chan!"

"C-Cut it out, will you!? And would you let me go already!?" I snapped as I tried to wiggle free from your arms. "And don't call me Shiro-chan!"

"Ah, sorry! Guess I got a little too carried away, huh?" you responded as you let go of me and walked ahead of me so we could now talk face to face. After taking a moment to take in my appearance, you added "Wow, you really did make it into the advanced class. That's amazing, Shiro-chan!"

"You say that as though you weren't in the advanced class too..." I mumbled as I looked off towards the side. Noticing the curious stares we were getting from the other students, I then quickly grabbed your wrist. "Let's talk somewhere else." I said before beginning to make my way out of the building, all the while pulling you along behind me.

* * *

Once we had reached a nearly deserted clearing outside the building, I stopped walking and faced you once more. "This should be far enough" I stated as I looked back at you. Noticing that I was still holding your wrist, I quickly let go of it in a feat of embarrassment at what I had done.

"Say, Shiro-chan," you began as you looked directly into my eyes. "Why didn't you tell me you enrolled here? I could have helped you and showed you around, you know. That way, you wouldn't have had to ask Kira-kun or Abarai-kun for directions."

"Well, uh, you see..." I fumbled as I tried to think of a reason on the spot. In reality, I had originally planned to figure out a reason to tell you within the next few days. So, as it stood at the moment, I still didn't really know what I wanted to tell you. "I guess I, uh,... wanted it to be a surprise?"

Seeing the confused look on your face, I internal facepalmed myself. _A surprise? That's seriously what I went with?_ I had thought to myself as I internally winced. G _od, that has to be the worst possible excuse I could have given her!_

"Ah, a surprise! That makes sense!" you stated as you smiled brightly at my dumbfounded face.

* * *

 _At the time, I couldn't believe you had fallen for my sorry attempt for an excuse. But, I chose not to question it too much, since it saved me the trouble of having to give you another answers._

 _However, as I think back now, you probably knew I was lying. After all, you could read me better than anyone else could, so you definitely knew I was hiding something. Yet, you chose to say nothing and accepted my excuse without question. You must have known that I didn't feel like honestly answering your question, so you decided not to push me on the subject._

 _You really are something, Hinamori Momo._

* * *

"And what a surprise it was too see you talking to Kira-kun and Abarai-kun this morning! I might not even of noticed you had Kira-kun not started talking about the white haired student he was helping out!" you continued as you recalled our brief encounter earlier that day.

 _So it was this Kira's fault I was caught, huh?_ I thought angrily as I pictured the blonde haired student from that morning. _He was probably bragging to Hinamori about helping out some poor helpless student, too._

I then shook the thought and image from my head before it lingered for too long. "Yeah, well, as I said, I wanted my enrollment here to be a surprise, so..." I said as I let the rest of my sentence fade into silence.

"Yeah, I know" you replied with the same gentle smile on your face. After pausing for a moment to look at the darkening sky, you added "It's starting to get pretty late. We should probably head back to the dorms now."

As I was about to reply, I was cut off by the sound of my growling stomach. _Crap, I forgot. I skipped lunch today_ I thought with a wince.

"How about we grab something to eat on our way back?" you asked with a slight laugh. "You probably didn't have a chance to eat lunch today with all the first day commotion, huh?"

"Y-Yeah, I didn't have the chance..." I had muttered in response.

Seeming satisfied with my answer, you grabbed my hand. "Come on! If we hurry, we can grab some food at my favourite canteen before it closes!" you eagerly stated as you began to run off back towards the academy, with my hand tightly in yours.

* * *

 _Being with you again at the Academy, it felt as though the part of me that had died when you left was suddenly full of life once again. Sure, we didn't get to see each other everyday because of our conflicting class schedules, but I was still able to just... Be with you. And that was enough._

 _So, as the years went on, we each got further and further along in studies. And, despite the fact that I had managed to skip a few years because of my prodigy status, you still managed to graduate before me._

* * *

"Hey, Shiro-chan, guess what!" I heard you call out from behind me, which caused me to take a break from my current training session in the field outside of the academy.

"Oi, I thought you agreed to call me by my last name" I retorted as I turned back to look at you. Seeing you grin from ear to ear, I added "Why are you so happy?"

"Tada! Check it out, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as you waved a black shinigami uniform in front of me. "I finally got accepted in the 13 court guard squads!"

"Wow, I guess they really do let bed-wetters become Shingamis. You certainly proved me wrong" I replied as I watched you wave around your new uniform. After registering my remark, a frown made its way onto your face.

"You're so mean, Shiro-chan..." you muttered as your frown turned into a pout. "And to think that I rushed all the way here so that you would be the first to know..."

 _I'm the first one she wanted to tell?_ I had thought as I began to feel a little guilty about my previous remark. _And she ran all the way here, too?_ And then knew I had to try and make up for what I had just said.

"Congratulations, Hinamori" I said as I offered you a slight smile. "I mean it, congratulations. You worked really hard for that, much harder than I've seen anyone else. And your kido skills are renowned throughout the school, so it makes sense that some captain would be eager to snag you for their squad." After taking a moment to reflect on my last remark, I added "So what squad took you in, anyway?"

And with that, your bright smile returned. "I'm in squad five with Aizen-taichou!" you happily declared with a grin plastered on your face.

After hearing you happily say Aizen's name, I felt my chest begin to tighten as I recalled the conversation we had about him all those years ago. _So he's still the one_ I had thought as the pain in my chest got worse.

"Shiro-chan, what's wrong? Are you hurt?" you called to me with a worried expression on your face. Seeing your face, I tried to break away from my thoughts and hide the pain I was currently feeling.

"I'm fine. It's nothing, really." I replied as I shifted my gaze away from yours.

You don't seem fine. Are you sure you don't want to go to the infirmary?" you asked as you closely examined my face.

"Nah, It's fine." I answered as I continued to look away from you. Then, under my breath, I muttered "I doubt they'd be able to do anything about it anyway..."

"Hmm? I didn't catch that last part" you questioned as you continued to examine me.

"D-Don t worry about, alright?" I slightly stuttered before turning to look at you once again. "Anyway, you must have other people to tell the good news to. So..."

"Ah! You're right!" you exclaimed with a small jump. "I promised I would check in with Kira-kun and Abarai-kun after we got our results! I guess I got too caught in telling you that I forgot to meet up with them. Oh, they're so gonna kill me for being late!" You then commenced to turn around and run back to the academy. "See you later, Shi-, I mean, Hitsugaya-kun!" you called back with a wave as you ran off.

"See you later, Hinamori..." I whispered in response as I watched you disappear from my sight. Once you were gone, I placed a hand gently on the spot where my chest had been hurting just moments before. _What was that?_ I thought as I pondered the cause of the sudden pain. _I've never felt a sudden pain like that before. So what was it? And why did it happen when Hinamori mentioned Aizen?_

* * *

 _I guess even a prodigy isn't immune to love... and heartache..._

* * *

 **Hey guys, hope you enjoyed chapter 5!**

 **I know I usually update more frequently than this, but I was pretty busy with work for my summer university classes.**

 **So, I thought I'd give you guys a longer chapter instead!**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing!**

 **~ H-Mira**


	6. Chapter 6: Entering squad 10

Chapter 6: Entering Squad 10

 _I managed to graduate from the Shinigami Academy two years after you entered the thirteen court guard squads. While, under normal circumstances, I should have only graduated after an additional three years, my status as a prodigy that "only comes around once every thousand years" allowed me to graduate early._

 _On top of graduating early, I was also appointed the title of third seat right away in squad ten. As extraordinary as it was to move up in the ranks so fast, it only made sense that I'd be given such a title right away. After all, I had already mastered my shikai and was currently working on achieving my Bankai at that point._

 _And so, as I made my way towards the squad ten barracks for the first time, I couldn't help but feel like I had finally caught up to you…._

* * *

 _Flashback, catching up to you_

"Hmm, you do look awfully familiar…" a young Matsumoto muttered to herself as she stared down at me. "Do I know you from somewhere…?"

I had merely sighed in response. It had been only a few minutes since I first properly introduced myself to the current captain and vice-captain of squad ten and Matsumoto was already beginning to recognize me from our first encounter all those years ago. It seemed that while I had recognized her right away, she was finding it harder to place me in her memories.

"I believe we met several years back in Jurinan…" I replied as I returned her blatant stare.

"Oh! I remember!" she suddenly exclaimed as though she had just put the pieces together in her head. "You're that brat with the high spiritual that was suffocating his grandmother! Say, how is the old women doing now, anyway?"

"She's doing fine…" I said in annoyance through my clenched teeth. "And would you please refrain from calling me a brat? My name is-"

"Yeah, yeah, sorry" she interrupted as she waved off my response and turned towards the squad ten captain. "Say, taichou, aren't you going to introduce yourself to the new kid? You did pick him from the academy yourself, after all."

Just as I was about to respond to Matsumoto comment about me being a "kid", the captain rose from his desk covered in paperwork and came over towards us. Once he reached us, he merely stood towering over us he closely examined me with an unreadable expression on his face.

* * *

 _I remember feeling a mixture of unease and nervousness as he stared down at me. You see, while I had heard countless tales from you about how wonderful captains were, or more specifically about how wonderful Aizen was, I had never actually been in the presence of one. So, this was my first time actually meeting someone of captain status, and never before had I felt as small as I did then. Just his mere essence was overflowing with power._

 _And I knew, right then and there, that if I ever wished for you to look at me with the same admiration that you looked at captain such as Aizen, I had a lot of work to do._

* * *

After about 30 seconds had passed, the squad ten captain broke the silence. "So, this is what you look like…" he muttered as he leaned in to get a closer look at my face. Then, he suddenly picked me up as though I was a toddler and lifted me into the air. "Well aren't you a cute one! Looks like I finally have a cute little son to look after!" he exclaimed with a goofy smile on his face.

I was too dumbstruck at the first to be able to say anything in response. Then, after a moment had passed, I was finally able to regain my ability to speak. "S-Sir? Um…" I weakly replied as I tried to regain my composure as much as I could while being lifted in the air. "Could you please put me down…?"

"Whatever you say, kiddo!" he exclaimed in response as he lowered me to the ground once more. "My name's Shiba Isshin, captain of squad ten." he said as he extended a hand out for me to shake. "But you can call me Dad if you want." he added with a wink.

"Um… I think I'll just stick to Shiba-taichou…" I muttered in response as I hesitantly shook his hand. _Are all captains like this?_ I had thought at the time as I was shaking his hand. _If so, I wonder what kind of guy this Aizen really is… And just what is his relationship with his subordinates…_

"Aw, that's no fun!" Shiba-taichou wined in response as I let go of his hand. "Rangiku here refuses to call me dad, and now you do too! I was hoping at least you would call me that, Toshiro! Because who knows if I'll ever have a real son of my own… I'm not getting any younger, you know."

"Uh, yeah, sure…. Whatever you say, Shiba-taichou…" I hesitantly replied, not sure whether I should be concerned about my now displeased captain. I remember reasoning to myself that since Matsumoto wasn't calling him _Dad_ either, I should be fine.

After a moment of awkward silence had passed, the captain spoke again. "Say, Rangiku, shouldn't you be at a vice-captain meeting at about now?"

"Ah! You're right!" she suddenly exclaimed as she remembered. "I completely forgot! They're initiating a new vice-captain today too, so I really can't be late!" She then took off towards the door, but before she could leave, the captain called out to her once more.

"Say, who's this new vice-captain again? I know their name came up at the captain meeting last week, but I honestly can't remember it for the life of me" he stated as he looked at Matsumoto, hoping she would know the answer to his question.

"Oh, her name's… uh… her name's…" Matsumoto fumbled as she tried to recall the name of the new vice-captain. After a moment had passed, it suddenly came to her. "Oh! Her name's Hinamori Momo! Yeah, that's her name! She's replacing Gin-, I mean, Ichimaru-taichou's old position as vice-captain of squad five."

"Oh, is that so…" Shiba-taichou muttered to himself in response. "Anyway, make sure to let me know whether she's a cutie or not!" he called out as Matsumoto merely brushed off the comment with the wave of her hand as she made her way out the door.

Meanwhile, I was stood frozen in place. While I had known that you were trying for the position of vice-captain within your squad, I had no idea that you were that close to achieving it. _So she finally did it, huh?_ I thought to myself as my mind began to wonder. _That's good, I'm glad…._

"Hmm? Something on your mind, Toshiro?" the captain suddenly questioned as he roused me from my thoughts.

"I-It's nothing, sir" I stuttered as I tried to regain my composure under my captain's watchful gaze.

"Oh, I get it" he stated as a grin made its way onto his face. "You're interested in this new vice-captain too, huh? You are beginning to get to that age, so it only makes sense. Oh! And don't worry about falling for a girl that your captain also finds cute! After all, as your new dad, I'll happily step aside for my son's happiness!"

"T-That's not it!" I exclaimed as my cheeks began to flush. "A-Anyway, is there you want me to do, Shiba-taichou?"

"There's no need to be embarrassed, Toshiro. It only makes sense to be interested in a cute sounding girl" he responded as he looked down at me. After seeming to notice that I was in no mood to further discuss the subject, he sighed as he decided to answer my question. "Hmm, well, I suppose you could help me with a few things…"

* * *

 _I remember spending the rest of that afternoon and early evening helping the squad ten captain with various tasks he had to do. While the idea had crossed my mind that he was making me help him with work he should have done himself, I merely brushed the thought aside as I helped him with duties. After all, as a newly appointed third seat, I couldn't exactly say no to him._

 _I did everything that day from paperwork to sparring with subordinates, to even running around delivering messages to other squads. By the time nightfall hit, I was exhausted._

* * *

"Thanks for the help, Toshiro!" Shiba-taichou exclaimed after a long day of making me do half of his work for him. "I'm happy to have such a reliable third seat! I'll definitely be relying on you in the future!"

 _Meaning you'll be making me do your work for you on a regular basis then…_ I thought grimly before giving him a short bow and exiting the tenth division office.

Once I was out of sight, I sighed. _Looks like it's too late to congratulate Hinamori on her promotion today, huh?_ I thought as I looked out the corridor windows as I walked back to my room. _Guess I'll just have to try and catch her tomorrow…. But if tomorrow's going to be anything like today, I doubt I'll get the chance…_

Then, just as I turned down the corridor in which my quarters, I noticed someone standing outside my room, almost as though they were waiting for me to return. Since they were facing away from, I couldn't make out their face. After taking a few steps closer without them being any wiser to my presence, I decided that I should probably say something.

And, almost as though they sensed that I was about to say something, the mysterious individual turned around to look at me.

And low and behold, that person was you.

"I was wondering when you were going to get back, Hitsugaya-kun" you said with a gentle smile on your face. "Must have been a long first day, huh?"

"Y-Yeah, it was…" I muttered in response as I took in your appearance. You were dressed in a white sleeping gown with your hair hung loosely in a ponytail over your shoulder. While I had been used to you dressing so casually in the past, I couldn't help but feel embarrassed looking at you now. It suddenly felt so personal, seeing you dressed in so little clothing. _It's almost as though-_ I started to think but immediately shook the thought from my head almost as soon as it had come. _What's wrong with me?! She's Hinamori! I shouldn't be thinking of her like that!_

"Say, Hitsugaya-kun," you softly began as you roused me from my internal conflict. "Would you be up to staying awake for a little bit longer? I, uh… You see, um..." You let the rest of your sentence fade into silence as your gaze shifted to your feet.

"Yeah, I guess I could stay up for a little while longer" I said as I read into between the lines at what you were implying.

"Great!" you exclaimed as you looked back at me with a smile. You then approached the door of my room and started to open it in an attempt to make your way inside.

As I watched you begin to make your way into my room, the image of Matsumoto and my captain catching you leave my room late at night appeared in my head. "H-Hey! How about we go somewhere else? It's nice night out, we should go outside. Come on, I know just the place!" I stated urgently as the picture of my superiors tormenting me about our _relationship_ filled my head. I knew that if they caught you leaving my room at this hour, it wouldn't matter how many times I told them we were just childhood friends: they wouldn't believe me. _No way am I letting that happen_ I thought with a slight shake of my head.

"Oh, Okay. Let's do that then" you replied with a slightly confused expression on your face. You then proceeded to close my door and follow me down the squad ten corridors.

* * *

Once outside, we settled on a spot near the squad ten training grounds to sit down and look at the night sky.

"Wow, you were right! It really is a nice night out" you exclaimed in awe as you took in the sight of the starry sky.

I grunted in response as I took in the scenery for myself. After a moment had passed, I decided to break the silence. "So, Hinamori, Congra-"

"Congratulations on becoming a third seat, Hitsugaya-kun!" you suddenly interrupted with a bright smile, unaware that I was about to congratulate you on your own promotion. "I gotta say, I was pretty surprised when I heard about it from Matsumoto-san at the vice-captain meeting earlier today. To think that you would get the rank of third seat right after graduating… You really are amazing, Hitsugaya-kun."

I remember breaking my gaze away from yours as I felt my inner temperature start to rise at your sudden compliment and bright smile. "S-So, you heard from Matsumoto-fukutaichou, huh…" I stuttered in an attempt to try and make it seem as though I was unaffected by your previous statement.

"Yeah, I did!" you happily exclaimed, ignorant to my flushed face. "She kept talking about the white haired…" you hesitated for a second before adding " _boy_ who just became her new third seat. It sounded like you really impressed her and Shiba-taichou, you know."

 _Don't you mean white haired brat?_ I thought sourly to myself with a slight frown. "I doubt I really impressed them that much" I responded as I turned away from you to look once again at the sky.

"Of course you did!" you half shouted as you forced me to look at you once more. "From what I heard, you've already mastered your shikai _and_ you're currently working on your Bankai! All that despite _just_ graduating! No matter how you look at it, Hitsugaya-kun, that's just plain amazing."

I grunted in response, unsure of how to respond to all the recent praise I was given.

Mistaking my grunt for not believing in what you just said, you continued. "I mean it, Hitsugaya-kun. You really are amazing. I just wish I was even half as talented as you are…"

"You say that as though you weren't just awarded the position of vice-captain of the fifth division" I retorted, not liking the way that you were beginning to put down your own achievements. Seeing the surprised look on your face, I added "I heard earlier today from Matsumoto-fukutaichou."

"Ah, okay…" you hesitantly responded, unsure of how to proceed in the conversation.

"Congratulations, by the way" I said as I broke the silence that was beginning to form between us. "It looks like you finally managed to achieve that goal you set for yourself all those years ago…. Guess I'll have to start calling you Bedwetter-Fukutaichou now, huh?" I added with a slight smirk on my face.

"Yeah, it looks like I did- Wait! Don't call me that!" you exclaimed in response. "Please, don't call me that!"

"Whatever you say, Bedwetter-fukutaichou" I replied as my smirk grew in response to your newly formed frown.

"You're so mean sometimes, Shiro-chan…" you muttered as you pouted at me. "And you can drop the fukutaichou around me. Just calling me by name is good enough. After all, we've each for so long, it would just be weird to start using fancy titles."

"Whatever you say, Bed-wetter" I responded, which earned me a glare from.

"Anyway, are you busy tomorrow? I was thinking of paying Oba-san a visit, and it'd be nice if you could join me." you asked with hopeful eyes as you changed the subject. Seeing the excitement on your face at the prospect of visiting her, I just couldn't say no.

"Y-Yeah, I should be free…" I lied, knowing full well that I had a fair amount of paperwork to help out with tomorrow. _Maybe if I hurry and get it done tonight, Shiba-taichou will let me take tomorrow off_ I thought as I tried to think of a solution to my current predicament.

"Great! I'll stop by tomorrow at noon, then!" you happily exclaimed before returning your attention once again to the night sky.

* * *

 _And so, once we said our farewells for the evening, I went back to my room with all the paperwork that was scheduled to be done tomorrow. While I knew that I wouldn't be asked to complete all of it by myself, I didn't want to take the chance of having to stay behind after I had told you I would go with you._

 _And then, before I knew it, it was already morning…_

* * *

"Here's today's paperwork" I stated with a small yawn as I handed my captain the work that I had spent the majority of the night completing.

"Wow, you did this all by yourself?" he said as an impressed look made its way onto his face. "Looks like I made the right call snatching you up when I did!"

"Y-Yeah…" I muttered, sighing as I guessed that he was going to start expecting me to keep up this heavy workload from now on. "A-Anyway, sir, would it be possible to have the rest of the afternoon off?"

"Hmm? Why do you need the rest of the day off?" he questioned as he closely examined my face for clues. "Not that I mind, you did complete all of today's work after all. I'm just curious."

"Well, uh…" I fumbled as I tried to think of a response. While it would have been easiest to simply tell them the truth, I had a funny feeling he would misunderstand the situation.

"OH! I bet you're going on a date with that cute girl from last night, huh?" I heard Matsumoto suggestively ask from behind me as she made her way into the room.

"W-What are you talking about?" I stuttered as a sense of dread and embarrassment made its way into the pit of my stomach.

"You know, that girl you were sitting down and talking to outside last night" she elaborated as she joined me in front of the captain's desk. "And don't even try to deny it, I saw you two on my way home from drinking last night. ...Okay, I couldn't really see you since it was pretty dark out, but I could tell by your white hair that it was you! And you definitely weren't alone!"

"Oh? You have a girlfriend, Toshiro?" Shiba-taichou exclaimed as I turned to look at him once more. "In that case, feel free to take the day off! It just wouldn't do for you miss your date with her, especially after you eagerly did all of today's paperwork just so you could go!"

"Listen! It's not a date! We're just-" I began but was then interrupted by the sound of the door opening and someone entering the room.

"Shiba-Taichou, Matsumoto-san, I have some paperwork for you from squad five!" I heard you exclaim from behind me as you approached us.

"Ah, perfect. Just set them down here, Momo." Shiba-taichou said as he gestured to his desk. "It is Momo, right? The new vice-captain of squad five?"

"Yup, that's me!" I heard you happily reply from behind me.

 _Can't he tell she's the new vice-captain by her badge?_ I thought to myself before turning my head to look at you. Once I saw your appearance, I understood his confusion. Rather than wearing your typical shinigami uniform, you were dressed in a light pink kimono with light orange flower decorations on it. No longer use to seeing you wear anything other than your uniform, I couldn't help but stare as I took in your appearance.

Seeming to finally notice my presence, you turned to face me. "There you are Hitsugaya-kun!" you exclaimed with a smile on your face as you addressed me. "I was wondering where you were. Guess it was a good thing I decided to deliver some paperwork before we went out this afternoon, huh?"

"Y-Yeah, looks like it was…" I muttered in response as I turned to look at the shocked faces of my two superiors. _Guess they weren't expecting someone like Hinamori_ I thought to myself as I took in their confused faces.

"Y-Your girlfriend's Hinamori!?" Matsumoto exclaimed as she seemed to regain her voice. "Wow, didn't think you had it in you to get a cute girl like her. Good for you, kiddo!"

"I agree!" Shiba-taichou added with a delighted smile on his face. "You've found yourself a real cutie, Toshiro. And a powerful one, no less! As your captain and designated father, I give you two my blessing!"

 _I knew they would act this way_ I thought with a sigh. _Oh well, guess it's better than being mistaken for her little brother like usual_. "Hinamori's my childhood friend; we grew up together in Jurinan. We're not going on a date, we're just going to go visit my grandmother." I stated as I tried to clear up the misunderstanding.

"Sounds an awful lot like a date to me…" Matsumoto muttered to herself as I shot her a quick glare which she ignored. "I mean, look at Hinamori. She's dressed awfully cute to just be visiting a friend's grandmother…"

Turning to look at you, I noticed your face turn a deep shade of red in response to her remark. "I-I'm just wearing the kimono Oba-san gave me…" you whispered as you lowered your gaze to your feet.

"Yeah, Yeah, whatever you say" Matsumoto replied, clearly not believing the reason you had just given her. "Anyway, you kids go on and have fun your date!" she added as she rushed us both towards the office exit.

"Oi, Matsumoto-fukutaichou, I told you it's not-" I began but was interrupted as she pushed us both outside the office.

"Bye now!" she said with a big grin on her face. "And don't do anything I wouldn't do!" she added before closing the doors to the tenth division office.

I sighed as I stared at the newly closed doors. "Well, guess we may as well head on out then…" I said as I turned to face you.

"Y-Yeah, let's go" you said as you tried to regain your composure after having to deal with the comments of my superiors. With a slight shake of your head, you then proceed to follow me outside of the tenth division barracks.

* * *

 _And that was how things were for me in squad ten. Despite constantly being overloaded with Matsumoto and Shiba-taichou's share of the paperwork, I still did enjoy my time with them overall. Things were always loud and eventful with them around. It definitely a nice change for the quiet days I had spent alone in Jurinan with Oba-san. I guess, in a way, they reminded me a bit of you in that regard._

 _And so, as time went on, I even began to find myself thinking of them as more than mere lazy superiors: they were companions, people I knew I could truly trust if the need ever arose._

 _Well, unless the need was to get paperwork done on time…_

 _Anyway, with them now in my life, it felt as though my small world starting to expand into something more. Slowly but surely, I felt myself starting to let more and more people into my life. The sphere of people I now cared about was starting to grow, all thanks to my acceptance in squad ten…_

 _That being said, it goes without saying that you were still at the center of my heart. That was one position which you could never lose to anyone, even if I knew I had lost that very same position in your own heart…_

 _Regardless, the days I spent as the third seat of squad ten were exciting yet peaceful at the same time. And they were only made better when you would come to visit._

 _Ever since that first day they saw us together, Matsumoto and Shiba-taichou would never stop going on about how you were my "girlfriend" and "how cute it would be if we got together", and even saying "how we were just meant to end up together". No matter how many times I would correct them, they would still insist that were we destined to fall in love with one another._

 _… Looks like they were right in the end, wouldn't you agree, Momo?"_

* * *

 **And Thanks for reading chapter 6!**

 **Man, this one took a while to write! I was starting to think that I might have to change my rule of having an entire life event per chapter! Fortunately, for those who hate cliff hangers, I was able to pull through and abide by my own rules!**

 **And, just as a sneak peak as to what's to come, I'm thinking of doing an Aizen chapter either the next update or the one after that. I already have an idea about what I want to say, and man, it's pretty sad. And I know it's just going to get even sadder when I actually write it down...**

 **Anyway, thanks again for reading and reviewing!**

 **~ H-Mira**


	7. Chapter 7: The Day I finally Realized

Chapter 7: The day I finally realized

 _A part of me has always wondered when it happened. Was it when we first entered the thirteen court guard squads? Was it during our training at the Shinigami Academy? Or, was it even further back than that? Maybe, it happened the first time I laid eyes on you..._

 _Either way, I can't remember._

 _I guess it's just always been there. A feeling that I've always had, yet never acknowledged. It was just something I felt whenever I was around you, so I didn't really think anything of it. It was merely a feeling and a warmth that I associated with you._

 _Yeah, that's probably the reason why it took me so long to finally realize._

 _And although I can't remember when it first happened, I can clearly remember the day I finally realized that I… was in love you._

* * *

 _Flashback, The day I knew I loved you_

"And to think that my cute little third seat is now all grown up into a captain" Matsumoto exclaimed as we were walking back from the captain initiation ceremony. "I'm so proud of you, kid!"

"Oi, it's Hitsugaya-taichou now." I retorted as I shot her a quick glare. "So now you actually _have_ to address me with respect."

"Ah, sorry, sorry." she replied with an apologetic look on her face. "I'm just so happy for you, is all. I'll make sure to address you properly from now on, Taichou."

* * *

 _I had merely nodded at her in response before continuing on our way back towards the 10th division barracks. While a part of me was proud of my accomplishment, it still felt wrong to be called the captain of the 10th division. While Shiba-taichou had already been missing for several years before I took over his position, it still felt like he was the captain of squad ten. And that no matter how much time would passed, he would still be the true leader of the division..._

 _So, needless to say, my captaincy took some getting used to._

* * *

"Oh, Taichou, I nearly forgot!" Matsumoto suddenly exclaimed once we reached the tenth division office. "We're throwing a celebration party for you this evening! So you better make sure you come. It just wouldn't do if the guest of honour wasn't there!"

"You just want another reason to drink…" I muttered under my breath as we walked into the office.

"Oh, don't be like that!" she retorted as she sat herself down on one of the couches. "This party is for _you_! We're throwing this party for _you_ , Taichou. And we put a lot of effort into preparing it too! So you better show up!"

"Fine" I replied with a sigh as I sat myself down behind of my new desk. After a moment had passed, I finally registers something odd about what she had said. "Wait, you said _we_. Who's this _we_?"

"Oh, you know…" Matsumoto said with a smirk on her face. "Just a special little someone."

* * *

 _No matter how much I would ask her who that "special little someone" was, Matsumoto would merely continue to smirk without revealing who it was. I remember feeling slightly irritated at her silent, but it didn't take me very long to brush it off. After all, I was going to eventually find out who it was at the celebration that evening. So all I had to do in the meantime was be patient._

 _Looking back, it should have been very obvious who this "special someone" was. Honestly, who else could she have been talking about? There was really only ever one "special little someone" to me…_

* * *

"Congratulations on your promotion Hitsugaya-taichou!" I heard for the one hundredth time that day. No matter where I went that day, I just couldn't make it more than a few steps without hearing someone rush over to congratulate me on my new position. While it had been nice to hear the first few times that day, having to engage in small talk with whoever was congratulating me was starting to get repetitive and exhausting.

"Thank you" I briefly replied before continuing on my way. While I had noticed that the shinigami who had just congratulated me seemed slightly confused when I began to walk off, I still didn't turn back around. There were still a few errands I had to run before nightfall and I was already falling behind schedule because of all the small talk I had to engage in earlier.

As I was walking down the hallway to my next task, my thoughts began to wonder. And when they did, it finally occurred to me: I hadn't been congratulated by you yet. In fact, I hadn't even seen you all day.

* * *

 _And it was with that thought in mind that I decided to pay a quick visit to the fifth division. My errands could wait; my sudden desire to see you could not._

* * *

"Oh, Hitsugaya-kun" a male voice exclaimed as I entered the fifth division office. "What brings you here?"

"Well, um.." I faltered as I looked around the room. "I was just… Well, I was in the area and thought I should stop by…"

"Ah, I see" Aizen replied with a gentle smile on his face. "Thank you for taking the time to stop by. And congratulations on your promotion. Judging on what I've heard from Hinamori-kun, it sounds like the thirteen court guard squads can expect great things from you."

"T-Thanks" I stuttered as I continued to look around the office. Oddly enough, I couldn't spot you anywhere. Which was pretty weird, since you were never one to play hooky when it came to paperwork.

"Ah, if you're looking for Hinamori-kun," Aizen began as he seemed to realize why I was examining his office. "She's actually in the world of the living at the moment. I sent her there yesterday to deal with a hollow that's been causing quite an uproar lately. She won't be back until tomorrow evening."

"Oh, I see…" I muttered as a feeling of disappointment started to wash over me. I tried to hide the disappointment in my voice when I added "I-In any event, I should really get going…"

"Alright" Aizen simply replied as I began to exit his office. "See you at your celebration this evening."

At the mention of the party that evening, the pit in my stomach grew. The thought of having to deal with my drunken vice-captain and her equally wasted friends was enough to make me consider skipping my own celebration party.

"Don't remind me…" I grumbled as I exited the office.

* * *

 _That pit in my stomach stayed with me for the rest of the day. And the more the day went on, the worst it got._

 _While I knew that I should be overjoyed, it was the first day of captaincy after all, but I just... wasn't. It seemed like no matter how much people would tell me that I should be in a state of delight because of my promotion, I still couldn't manage to escape from the frown on my face. And I knew the reason behind this was you._

 _Without you to celebrate with, the promotion almost felt… meaningless. After all, it was my desire to protect you that drove me to the lengths that qualified me for captaincy. So without you there to celebrate with me, it felt like there wasn't even much of a point. With you, my very reason for becoming a captain, absence from the celebration, it really didn't feel like a celebration at all. It just felt empty… meaningless…_

 _And as the hours went on and the party began, I just couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to be with you… and only you…_

* * *

"Oh, Taichou! Have a drink with me!" a drunken Matsumoto called out to me as waved a glass of sake in her hand. "You're a captain now! You _have_ to celebrate!"

"I'll pass, thanks…" I swiftly replied with my usual frown plastered on my face. "Someone has to make sure things don't get out of hand."

"But Taichou!" Matsumoto wined as she waved her drink around in protest, resulting in it splashing on those around her. "You _have_ to have a drink! You _have_ to celebrate!"

"I don't _have_ to drink and I _have_ been celebrating. I _am_ actually here, after all" I retorted with my arms crossed over my chest. _Though I'd much rather not be_ I thought to myself as I began to survey my drunken company.

"Bullshit, Taichou! I call bullshit!" Matsumoto exclaimed as she began to glare at me. "You say you've been celebrating, but that frown hasn't left your face all afternoon!"

"What frown? This is how I always look" I coolly replied as I looked her dead in the eye.

"Well, yeah, I guess…" she faltered as her glare's intensity started to diminish. "But I was hoping you would smile. You know, like the way you do whenever Hinamori's around."

* * *

 _Had it been any other day, I simply would have tried to brush off her comment in an attempt to hide my embarrassed. But after the day I was having, a day filled with nothing but a sense of disappointment and longing, I snapped._

* * *

"Well she's not here, is she?!" I angrily replied a little louder than I had originally intended, which caused some of the other guests to look my way. But at the time, I didn't care. Too caught in the overflowing emotions that were making their way to the surface, I added "So how can you expect me to be happy when she's not here!?"

Matsumoto, as well as the party guests surrounding her, were taken aback at my sudden outburst. "Taichou…" she muttered as she looked at me with a mixed expression of hurt and disbelief.

Seeing the look on her face, I immediately started to regret my outburst. "Look, um…" I fumbled as I looked off to the side. "Sorry… I just.. Um…"

I then looked up to see Matsumoto smiling gently at me. "It's alright, Taichou." she said as all the previous anger in her face seemed to disappear. "Say, how about you take a walk outside? Get some fresh air."

"Y-Yeah, I'll do that…" I muttered, half taken aback at her sudden change of expression. Then, with a quick nod to her, I exited the tenth division banquet hall and went outside.

* * *

 _And once I stepped outside, that's when I saw it._

* * *

There you were, a bright smile on your face illuminated by a sparkler, as you were carrying a small bag towards the banquet hall I had just left. Too shocked to say anything, I merely stood frozen in place as I watch you smile at the sparkler's light that was now beginning to fade.

"Perfect, I'm glad they work…" I heard you mutter to yourself, satisfied that the sprinkler you used a test produced the results you desired. "Now I just have to…" but the rest of your sentence faded away as you looked up to see me staring back at you.

"Oh, Hitsugaya-kun, you're here" you stated as your slightly surprised expression turned into a smile. "I thought you would still be in the banquet hall."

"I, uh, decided to step out for a moment. To get some fresh air" I said, still surprised to see you standing in front of me. "Hinamori… what… What are you doing here? I thought you were only getting back tomorrow evening."

"Hmm? Getting back from what?" you questioned with a slightly confused expression on your face. "What are you talking about, Hitsugaya-kun?"

"I saw Aizen earlier today and he said you were on a missing…" I began as I was starting to piece of the puzzle together. "Though I see now that he must have been lying…"

"Oh, don't blame Aizen-Taichou, Hitsugaya-kun!" you exclaimed as you began to walk towards me. "I asked him to cover me if case you came looking for me today. I guess the mission was just the excuse he went with."

"Why didn't you want me to find you today?" I asked, slightly hurt that you had been hiding from me all day.

"Well, you see," you began as your smile returned. "I wanted to make sure everything was perfect for tonight. So, I decided to take the day off and help Matsumoto with the celebration party she planned for you. Because of that, I couldn't have you finding me throughout the day, or else the surprise would be ruined!"

"You spent all day preparing that…For me?" I muttered, starting to feel as an emotion I couldn't quite identify taking over me. It was very same emotion that you, and only you, could manage to bring out of me.

"Yup, that's right!" you happily replied, unaware of just how much your actions were affecting me. "I started early this morning and finished at around supper time. Since Rangiku-san was making sure that you didn't wander off into the banquet all by mistake, it was up to me to decorate the place."

"If you were finished at around supper time," I said as I tried to regain my composure. "Then why weren't you at the party earlier? Why only show up now?"

"Oh, that's because of these!" you replied as you gestured to the small bag you were carrying. "I went to go grab some sparklers from some of the local stores, but they were out of stock. So I had to go all the way to the world of the living to buy them. They were pretty hard to find, so I only got back just now."

I couldn't help but smile in response. _Only you would spend four hours trying to find sparklers for my sake_ I thought with a slight laugh. "Honestly, Hinamori, only a bed-wetter like you would have to spend four hours trying to find sparklers. Don't tell me you got lost?" I said with a gentle smile on my face, a smile I reserved only for you.

You frowned in response. "That's mean," you said with a pout in your lip. "I've only been to the world of the living a couple of times, and it's really easy to get lost… And I don't wet the bed anymore! So don't call me that!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say" I responded with a smirk. "And speaking of names, shouldn't you be calling me Hitsugaya- _Taichou_ from now on?"

"Hmmm" you thought out loud as you stepped closer to examine me. I remember feeling the heat rise in my cheeks as you closely looked me up and down. After what felt like an eternity, you finally spoke again.

"Nope, you're still Shiro-chan to me!" you exclaimed with your usual bright smile as you backed away. "No matter what, you'll always be my Shiro-chan. So it'd just be weird to call you by anything else."

"Oi, stop calling me that!" I retorted as my face was being enveloped in a dominate shade of red. "And you've been calling me Hitsugaya-kun for the last little while, so changing the _-kun_ to _-Taichou_ shouldn't be that big of a deal!"

You then began to laugh slightly in response.

"W-What's so funny!?" I stammered, taken aback at your sudden outburst of laughter.

"You didn't deny it" you replied in between fits of laughter.

"I didn't deny what?" I cautiously asked as I looked at you with a confused look on my face.

"That you're my Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as laughter took hold of you. I merely stood frozen place as I watched you laugh as though it was the funniest thing in the world.

"I, uh, well…" I fumbled, not too sure what to say in response. While a part of me felt like I should retort with something along the lines of "I'm not your Shiro-chan", I just couldn't bring myself to say it. Because when I thought it, it felt like I was lying. _Why does it feel like a lie?_ I thought to myself, surprised at this sudden sensation. _Why didn't I say that I wasn't her Shiro-chan? And just why does it feel like a lie whenever I think that I'm not hers?_

"Well, that was a good laugh" you suddenly said as you recovered your composure, breaking me from my thoughts as a result. "Anyway, we should get started on these sparklers. I'll go grab the Rangiku-san, Aizen-Taichou, and the others so we can start!" you added before beginning to make your way past me and towards the banquet hall.

"No!" I suddenly exclaimed as I grabbed a hold of your wrist to prevent you from getting anyone else. Seeing your slightly confused face turn back to look at me, I immediately let go or your hand. I then fumbled for a moment as I tried to think of an excuse for my actions. "T-They're my sparklers, right? So why should I share them with anyone else?"

* * *

 _Despite my obviously selfish and childlike excuse, you still found it in you to accept it as the truth._

* * *

"Alright" you simply said with a smile before handing me one of the sparklers in the bag you were carrying. "Is it alright if I use one too?"

"Yeah, that's fine…" I muttered shyly as I took the sparkler from your hand. "Do you have a lighter or something to light them with?"

Rather than answering, you simply extended your index finger and muttered a kido spell under your breath, causing the sparkler to catch light. You then proceed to grab another sparkler and do the same thing to it.

"I guess that works too…" I said, feeling slightly embarrassed that I hadn't thought of that in the first place.

"Hey, check it out!" you exclaimed as you twirled the sparkler around and began making the shapes of various objects. "Isn't this fun?! It's just like when we were younger and Oba-san bought us some for New Years!"

At first, I didn't answer you. I was far too mesmerized by the sight of you as the light from the sparkler lite up various aspects of your appearance and face. _Beautiful…_ I thought as stared directly at you. _She's beautiful… Has she always been this beautiful? How haven't I noticed until now?_

"Hmm? Is something the matter, Hitsugaya-kun?" you asked as you stopped twirling around the sparkler and looked at me.

* * *

 _And that's when it all finally sank in. My irritated mood all the day… My longing to see you… My undeniable desire to protect you… It now made sense._

 _Everything now made sense._

* * *

"It's nothing." I said with gentle smile on my face. "I just realized something, is all."

"Oh? What did you realize?" you asked curiously.

"Just something I should have figured out a long time ago." I replied before taking a few steps in the opposite direction of the banquet hall and towards the open field in front of me.

"Hitsugaya-kun…?" I heard you mutter as I continued to walk off.

* * *

 _While I knew that you must have been pretty confused at my sudden statement, I just couldn't bring myself to worry about that. All that mattered now was the sense of ease I was feeling at having finally realizing something I should have known all along…_

* * *

"Well don't just stand there like an idiot." I said as a stopped walking turned back to look at you. "Are you coming or not?"

After taking a second to recover from your surprise, you nodded and ran up to catch up with me.

* * *

… _I love you, Hinamori Momo._


	8. Chapter 8: Letting Go

**Hello and welcome to chapter 8 of _To Be With You_!**

 **Just a fair warning, this is a pretty sad chapter (if you can't already tell by the title of the chapter).**

 **There is also some one sided AiHina in this chapter as well. But don't worry! As always, HitsuHina will prevail in the end!**

 **Anyway, without further delay, please enjoy chapter 8!**

* * *

Chapter 8: Letting Go

 _I've heard that most people usually start to act pretty awkward once they realize that they've fallen in love with someone. And I've witnessed that first hand with Matsumoto. I swear, the day she realized she was in love with Ichimaru was a day I'll never forget. After all, how could I? She did end up nearly destroying half the office when he came over that day to deliver some paperwork…_

 _But that never happened to me. I'm not too sure why, but whenever I saw you after that, I just didn't feel nervous at all. All I felt was a sense of calm, peace, and warmth. It was suddenly just so relaxing to simply be in presence. It felt like whenever I was with you, everything was just… right._

 _And I still continued to feel that way around you, even when I realized that I wasn't the one you wanted..._

* * *

 _Flashback, And then I let you go:_

"So, Taichou, have you decided what to get Hinamori for her birthday yet?" Matsumoto asked as she leaned over my desk to watch me work.

"Of course I already decided what to get her. And I already bought it too." I replied bluntly without looking up from my workload. "Her birthday's tomorrow, after all."

"Shit it's tomorrow?! I thought it was next week!" she exclaimed as she straightened herself up. I then lifted my gaze to see her start to make her way out of the office in a hurry.

"Matsumoto, don't you dare-" I began but was interrupted by the sound of her slamming the door shut after exiting the room.

I sighed. _Well, if it's for the sake of getting Hinamori a gift for her birthday, I guess I can let it slide_ I thought as I returned my attention to my paperwork.

* * *

 _Despite trying my best to focus on my paperwork, my thoughts couldn't help but wonder to you. And when they did, I just had to let loose a slight smile. I couldn't wait to see your reaction to the gift I had gotten you. I remember thinking that no one else's gift could even hope to reach, let alone surpass, my own._

 _But then again, I guess hopes and expectations are just made to be crushed…_

* * *

"Oi, Hinamori, are you ready yet?" I called out to you from outside your bedroom door. "Everyone's already outside waiting for you, you know."

"Just give me another minute and I'll be out!" you answered from inside your room. "I'm almost done!"

"Geez, Hinamori. I've been waiting for you for the last 20 minutes." I replied with a frown and my arms crossed over my chest. "Seriously, how long does it take for you to get ready?"

"Done!" you suddenly exclaimed as you opened your bedroom door and stepped outside to join me. "Sorry I made you wait so long, Hitsugaya-kun."

I remember pausing for a moment to take in your appearance. You had your hair down and were dressed in a light blue kimono with a dark blue floral design towards the bottom. "Well, as long you're ready now…" I replied as I unfolded my arms from across my chest with a sigh. "Let's get going. We can't have you be late to your own birthday, now, can we?"

You nodded in response as you followed me down the fifth division hallways and outside. "You know, I still don't see why we had to celebrate it tonight." you said as we were walking towards the fifth division banquet hall. "My birthday's only tomorrow, after all."

"It's because the weather for tomorrow would ruin your gift." I replied as we continued to walk. "While it's true that I could always just use Hyorinmaru to change it, I'd rather not bother my zanpactou for something like that." After pausing for a moment, I added "And besides, I think my gift will be a great way to start off your birthday."

"So then what _is_ my gift?" you curiously asked as the fifth division banquet hall was coming into sight. "It must really be something big if it has to rely on good weather…"

I remember smirking in response. "Well, you'll just have to wait and see now, will you?" I answered before opening the banquet hall doors and making my way inside.

"Wow, this is incredible…" I heard you mutter from behind me as you followed me inside. I turned around to see you looking in awe at the decorations I had made Matsumoto help me set up earlier that day.

"Hinamori, Taichou, you finally made it!" Matsumoto exclaimed from the middle of the room as she made her way through the crowd to join us. "I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to show up!"

"Oh, sorry about that, Rangiku-san" you replied with quick little bow. "We were a little busy…"

"Don't you mean _you_ were a little busy?" I interrupted with a slight smirk to my lips. "Honestly, Hinamori, it really shouldn't take that long…"

"You say that as though you know how long it takes to properly put on a kimono" you retorted with a slight frown. "It takes a while to put on! Especially if you're doing it by yourself!"

"Then why didn't you just have Taichou _help_ you?" Matsumoto asked with a mischievous gleam in her eyes. "After all, I'm sure if you had asked, he _gladly_ would have helped."

"Rangiku-san!" you exclaimed with slightly redder face. "There's no way I could have asked Hitsugaya-kun for something like that!"

"Oi, it's Hitsugaya-Taichou now" I stated as I ran one of my hands through my hair in annoyance. "And I don't see what the big deal is. I used to help Oba-san when she would dressed you up when we were younger, after all, so it's not like I haven't done it before. Besides, if I had helped you, we could have gotten here a lot sooner."

"But Hitsugaya-kun!' you pouted as you once again ignored my request to be addressed by my title. "That was a long time ago! Things are different now!"

I sighed in response. _I know things are different now_ I thought to myself. "Look, Hinamori-" I began but was interrupted by the sound of Kira and Abarai calling you over from halfway across the room.

"Oh, it's Kira-kun and Abarai-kun!" you exclaimed as you wave over to them. "I'm going to go over and say hi" you added before beginning to make your way over to them. I merely sighed once again as I watched you walk off.

"You know, Taichou," Matsumoto began once you were out of earshot. "You really should start seeing her as more than simply the girl you grew up with. She _is_ a beautiful young woman after all. So it wouldn't hurt for you to address her as such every now and again."

"I know" I replied with another sigh as I watched you happily converse with Kira and Abarai from across the room. "There's no need to remind me."

"I beg to differ!" Matsumoto exclaimed as she teared my gaze away from you so I would look at her. "And I bet you didn't even compliment her on her outfit! She looks beautiful tonight, Taichou, so it wouldn't hurt to tell her that. After all, whenever a girl looks beautiful, she deserves to be told!"

"If I told her that whenever I thought she looked beautiful, then I'd have to tell her that every time I see her." I answered as I turned to look at you once again. However, you were no longer talking to Kira and Abarai. In fact, I had completely lost sight of you. As I looked around the room for you once more, the realization of what I had just blurted out to Matsumoto hit me. "Wait, Matsumoto, please tell me that I didn't just say that out loud…"

After taking a moment to look back Matsumoto, who now had a stupid grin on her face, I had the answer to my own question. "You didn't hear that" I stated before beginning to walk away from her and further into the crowd of guests.

"Whatever you say, Taichou!" I heard Matsumoto call out from behind me. By the sound of her voice, it was obvious she still had that stupid grin on her face. With yet another sigh, I shook my head as I began to walk around and look for you in the crowd. It was just about time for _it_ to start and I didn't want you to miss a part of it because you were stuck inside talking to someone.

After a minute or two of searching, I finally found you happily chatting away with one of your subordinates. As soon as I saw you, I immediately rushed over to you and grabbed your hand before dragging you outside. I merely ignored the confused looks I was getting from you and your subordinate as I continued to bring you outside.

"Hitsugaya-kun?" I heard you ask from behind as we wiggled our way through the crowd of people. "What's going on? And what's the big rush? It was pretty rude to just abruptly leave like that, you know."

"Well we're going to miss the beginning if we don't go outside now" I replied as we finally escaped the crowd and could now freely make our way outside.

"The beginning? The beginning of what-" you began but you were suddenly interrupted by the sound of something exploding in the sky above. Unsure of what was going on, you rushed outside.

"Huh? What was-" you started again but was, once again, interrupted by the sound of something exploding off into the distance. It was only then that you decided to look up to see the fireworks lighting up the sky above.

"Now do you understand why my gift was weather dependent?" I asked with a smirk on my face as I joined you outside to enjoy the view.

"Shiro-chan…" you muttered beside me as you looked at the sky in awe. "You did this… for me?"

"Happy Birthday, Hinamori" I said as I looked over at you with a gentle smile on my face. Seeing the look on your face as you watched the sky light up above you, I knew that it was worth all the effort of having to put up with the Shiba clan the day before to organize the event.

"Thank you so much, Shiro-chan!" you exclaimed as you suddenly broke your gaze from the sky and engulfed me in a hug. "I mean it, thank you! This is the best present ever!"

"I'm glad you like it" I replied as I wrapped my arms gently around you and lightly returned the hug.

"Ah, Hinamori-kun, there you are!" I heard a male voice exclaimed from behind us. Hearing the voice, you immediately let go of me, much to my disappointment. I then turned around to glare at whoever had just ruined our moment.

"Oh, Hitsugaya-kun, you're here too" Aizen added as he offered me a gentle and semi-apologetic smile. "I didn't see you there."

 _Yeah, right. There's no way that bastard could have seen her and not me_ I thought angrily to myself as I continued to glare at him. Meanwhile, you simply began smile brightly as you took in Aizen's presence.

"Oh, yes, Hinamori-kun" Aizen continued as he redirected his attention away from my glare and back towards you. "Here, this is birthday gift from me to you."

"Oh, Aizen-taichou, you really didn't have to…" you muttered shyly as you accepted the gift and began to unwrap it. Once the gift was visible, your face lite up even brighter than before. "Wow, you bought me a hair cloth?! It's beautiful! Thank you so much, Aizen-taichou!"

 _So he got her a light blue hair cloth, huh?_ I thought as I looked down at the gift in your hands.

"I saw it the other day while I was out shopping and thought it would suit you" Aizen replied with the same old smile on his face. "And it turns out I was right."

"Oh, it's beautiful, Aizen-taichou!" you exclaimed brightly as you smiled up at Aizen. "I'll make sure to treasure it always!"

"I'm glad to hear that you like it so much. I was worried that it might get overshadows by some of your other gifts" Aizen stated before shooting a quick look to the fireworks that were exploding up above. "But it looks like I had _nothing_ to worry about."

I began to clench my fist as I focused a glare on Aizen. His gentle, smiling face was starting to piss me off even more than before.

"Anyway, I have some business to attend to, so I'll have to excuse myself" Aizen said as he looked from me and then to you. "Happy Birthday, Hinamori-kun" he added before making his way back into his division.

As he left, I couldn't help but feel a pit growing in my stomach as I watched you follow his departure with your eyes.

* * *

 _Ever since that day, wherever you went and whenever I saw you, you would always be wearing that hair cloth he gave you. And whenever someone would comment on it, you would always shyly blush and answer saying that it was a gift from your captain._

 _After that day, my dislike towards Aizen grew even more. I was then determined that the guy had to have some weakness or shortcoming; just something to prove that he wasn't as perfect as you made him out to be. And so, for the weeks following your birthday, I was especially harsh and cold towards Aizen as I tried to find some fault in him._

 _But, in the end, I couldn't._

 _No matter what I would say or what I would do, he would always just calmly address the situation at hand with his signature smile on his face. I had even tried secretly following him around from time to time, just to see if he would show his true colours when no one was looking…._

… _.But it seemed like he had no true colours to show._

 _I kept thinking that there had to be something, anything… just to let me believe that he wasn't the person everyone made him out to be. But as I continued to follow him, all I could see was that what everyone said about him was true. He was kind, considerate, gentle, strong… tall…._

 _The longer I watched him, the more I realized that he was everything I wasn't. I wasn't kind, considerate, warm or… tall. I was just some cold kid that happened to have attained the rank of captain because of my previous captain's prolonged absence. It was beginning to feel like those kids back in Jurinan had been right all along…._

 _The only good thing people could say about me was that I somehow managed to have you by my side. But now…. Even you were being stolen away from me…_

 _It felt like I was losing everything. You were gone and I… was alone._

 _That's when I came to the following realization one day while watching you interact with Aizen. If I had to lose you to anyone, then I was fine if it was to someone like him. With all the thing he had going for him, I knew he would look after you… and do a better job of protecting you and making you happy than I ever could…_

 _And so, once I decided that it was for the best to entrust your happiness to Aizen, I decided to let you go…_


	9. Chapter 9: Betrayal

Chapter 9: Betrayal

 _The months following my decision to let you go were hard for me. I guess, when it comes down to it, letting someone go is a lot easier said than done. It seemed like no matter how much I told myself that you would be better off with him, a part of still hoped that I… could stay by your side. Even if it was only as a friend, I told myself I was fine with that. After all, you had given me so much happiness over the years, so the least I could do was support you in the pursuit of your own happiness… Even if that happiness wasn't with me._

 _But it was just so difficult, watching you look at him like that. It was unbearable._

 _And so, I began to distance myself from you in an attempt to shield myself from further pain. Whenever I would see you or whenever you would call out to me, I would just ignore you and turn the other way…._

 _I know this hurt you, I could see it in your eyes every time I turned away. But please try to understand… I wasn't keeping my distance from you because I wanted to be apart from you. In fact, deep down, I still craved your kindness and your warmth more than anything. But I... I had to be apart from you... Because every time I would see you, that blue hair cloth would remind me that… I wasn't the one. And that was just too much for me to bear…_

 _And so, months passed, and then years. And as they passed, our relationship was deteriorating more and more…._

 _I know this was my fault. Had it not been for my feelings towards you, we could have still maintained the relationship we always had. But once I realized I loved you, I just couldn't be satisfied with what that anymore…. No, I wanted more than that. I wanted you, and only you, all to myself. And it was because of this selfish desire of mine that our friendship was fading away._

 _At that point, I had pretty much given up all hope of ever being with you. But then, just as I was trying to imagine a future without you, the unthinkable happened…_

* * *

 _Flashback, Never Again:_

"Well, Taichou, I'll be heading to the vice-captains meeting now" Matsumoto declared as she sat up from her usual spot on the tenth division office couch. "I swear, with these pesky Ryoka around, there's so much more work to do. It's really annoying."

"You say that as though you actually _do_ any of the work" I retorted as I looked up from my paperwork. "Honestly, Matsumoto, you have no right to complain if you're not going to help with any of it."

"I _do_ help!" she exclaimed before making her way to the door. Once she reached it, she added "Well, _sometimes_ I do. Anyway, I'm off!" and then exited the room.

I merely sighed in response before returning to the work at hand. _Despite the fact that she isn't helping at all, she is right about one thing_ I thought as I continued the paperwork assigned to my division. _These Ryoka are causing a lot more work for us._

After a few minutes of working, that's when it happened. All of a sudden I felt a large amount of vice-captain level spiritual pressure being released all at once. As soon as I felt it, I knew it belonged to you. Worried that you had encountered one or more of the Ryoka on your own, I stormed out of my office and rushed to where you were. Even with the distance that was now between us, there was still no force in the world that could ever stop me coming to your aid.

* * *

 _And when I got there, that's when I saw it. Plastered on the wall above everyone was Aizen's dead body. I was so shocked to see him hanging there that I momentarily forgot you were fighting below._

 _There was the man, the man I had entrusted your happiness and protection to… and he was dead. A title wave of emotions washed over me in that moment. However, I didn't have time to process them all. Because, soon after I arrived, I started to feel two more powerful spiritual pressures coming from below. And one of them had the intent to kill…_

* * *

Rushing to where you were, I blocked Kira's zanpaktou with mine as I stomped yours into the ground with my foot. I resisted the urge to wince as I felt a cut form under my foot where I had made contact with your zanpaktou. Even though I knew I could have prevented that cut had I used my sword to block yours rather than use it to block Kira's, there was no way I could ever raise my sword against you.

"Hitsugaya-kun…" you muttered as you stared at me, your anger temporarily subsiding as you looked at me in confusion.

"Seize them. _Both_ of them" I stated bluntly, not giving you a chance to say anything more. As soon as I said that, the remaining vice-captains broke free of their trance and restrained both you and Kira at once.

"But Hitsugaya-kun!" you pleaded as were taken back and restrained. "He's-"

"Hinamori!" I interrupted as I turned to look at you. "Do you honestly think now is the time to be fighting?! Regardless of your anger, your first priority as a vice-captain should have been to take down Aizen's body. I thought you, of all people, would know that!"

All I got in response from you was a glare. And I knew what that glare was trying to tell me: _you're the one who told me to be weary of them in the first place and now you're refusing to help me_. _How dare you...How could you!?_

"And Kira" I added as I turned away from you and glared at the third division vice-captain. "Need I even say anything more?" Seeing the frightened look in his eyes, I knew nothing more needed to be added. After all these years of knowing the relationship I had with you, he knew the consequences of trying to harm you. "No? Good. Now, take them both away and out of my sight." I added harshly before the remaining vice-captain started to drag you both away.

Once you were both out of sight, Ichimaru finally decided to speak. "My, My, I'm sorry about Izuru" he said with his signature smile on his face. "You shouldn't have had to deal with _my_ vice-captain. So I'll take full responsibility for his actions."

"Ichimaru…" I muttered with the utmost intensity. "Just now, you were about to kill Hinamori, were you?"

"Now, whatever are you talking about?" he replied with his same carefree demeanor.

"I'm warning you, Ichimaru" I added as I ignored his excuse. "If you ever make Hinamori bleed, I'll kill you."

"My, My, how scary" he responded. "You best keep an eye on her, then. It would be a _shame_ if something happened to her."

* * *

 _After that encounter, I fully devoted my time to solving the mystery behind Aizen's death. Though I still managed to find time to complete my paperwork, not to mention yours, I dedicated all of my remaining time to figuring out what happened to Aizen. While I had my suspicions that Ichimaru was behind his death, I still needed proof. And that proof would allow me to avenge Aizen's death once and for all._

 _This may seem strange to you, me going to such lengths for him and all... After all, I wasn't exactly a huge fan of Aizen. But even so, I still did whatever I could to find out happened because I knew how much he meant to you..._

 _So, in order to get you the closure you needed, I vowed to do whatever I could. And that included giving you that letter he wrote you…_

* * *

"Hinamori…" I muttered in disbelief as you held your zanpaktou at my throat. "W-What are you doing…?"

"What Aizen-Taichou asked of me…" you whispered in response as you stared coldly at me. "Tell me... why did you do it, Hitsugaya-kun? Why did you kill Aizen-Taichou!?"

I stood there stunned in response. "Y-You think I…" I began as I tried to process what you were saying "W-Why? What makes you think I…"

"It was in his letter..." you replied as I started to make out the faint sparkle of tears as they began to run down your face. "A-According to his letter, you're the mastermind behind all of this… And when Aizen-Taichou found out your plan, you…." You didn't finish the rest of your sentence. Instead, consumed by rage and grief, you screamed as you swung your zanpaktou at me.

* * *

 _Fortunately, your coordination was deeply impaired by your intense emotions. As a result, I was easily able to dodge your attack. It didn't take you long to recover from the impact of your swing and you then began to charge at me once again._

 _As I dodged your grief filled attacks, I desperately tried to think of some way to reason with you. And as I tried to think of a solution, I noticed a knowing smirk forming on Ichimaru's lips…_

* * *

"YOU!" I yelled at Ichimaru as I began to piece things together. "You did this! Your forged Aizen's letter! Hinamori, can't you see!? He's the one behind all of this!"

You then stopped swinging at me for a moment to consider what I had just said. "H-He's the one behind this…" you muttered as you tried to consider the alternative I had just presented you. However, the thought didn't last long. "No…. The letter was definitely written by Aizen-Taichou… It was in his handwriting…" You then shook the thought from your head as you resumed your charge at me.

However, this time, you only swung at me once before stopping your advances. As I looked at you frozen in place, I could see you shaking as you gripped your zanpaktou as hard as you could. "I-I…" you began as your voice cracked and tears streamed down your face. "I don't know what to do anymore… Shiro-chan…"

* * *

 _Never before had I seen you look so… lost. You looked as though everything that you had ever known was a lie… As though your entire world was being torn apart…_

 _And that's when I knew how much of an idiot I was. All this time, I had been thinking that you didn't care about me anymore, now that you had Aizen…_

 _But I was wrong. I was so, so wrong._

 _My own self-pity had blinded me from what was right in front of me. You did care, you always cared… Even when I started avoiding you and creating distance between us, you never once stopped caring... I was just too stupid to see it._

 _And now, you were being forced to choose between the two people you cared about the most. And it was tearing you apart..._

* * *

"Hinamori…" I whispered as I stared in shock back at you.

You then screamed again as you blindly charged at me, leaving me no choice but to jump in the air to dodge your attack. However, this time, you didn't pause after your swing. You immediately leapt into the air after me as you prepared another attack.

* * *

 _And then I… hit you._

* * *

"Now, now, did you have to hit the poor thing so hard?" I heard Ichimaru remark behind me as I stared down at your unconscious body. "The girl was obviously delusional. So there was really no need to be so rough with her, Hitsugaya-Taichou."

* * *

 _It was then that I noticed stains of red covering your hands where you were gripping your sword just seconds before…_

* * *

"Ichimaru…" I growled as I began to lose control of my spiritual pressure. "I warned you before, didn't I? That if you ever made Hinamori bleed… I will kill you myself!"

* * *

 _I remember then charging at Ichimaru in a fit of rage. I won't bore you with the details of it, since it really wasn't much of a fight. Fortunately, Matsumoto showed up before things got too heated. And as I'm sure you can guess, Ichimaru backed off the minute she showed up in the line of fire._

 _In any event, after that night, I kept you in the tenth division medical room. After what happened and the newly acquired knowledge I had about potential enemies, there was no way I was letting you out of my sight. It was obvious that whoever was behind all this had intended to have you die by my hand. Because of this, I knew you wouldn't be safe in the fourth division. So I kept you in the tenth division, where I knew I could look after you until you woke up…_

 _While you were unconscious, I was determined to get to the bottom of this. That way, when you finally woke up, I could prove to you that I wasn't what the letter said I was. And it was with that thought in mind that I investigated central 46… And also ran after Kira when I saw him there…_

* * *

"Now, Hitsugaya-Taichou," Kira began as Matsumoto and I chased after him. "Is now _really_ the time to be chasing me? Shouldn't you be looking after _Hinamori-kun_?"

"What are you talking about, Kira?" I replied as I quickened my pace. "Hinamori is safely asleep in the tenth division barracks. I _personally_ made sure no one can get to her while she's there."

"Oh, so you haven't noticed then?" he added without turning around. "That she's been following you around this whole time? Well, that is, until we left central 46. Honestly, Hitsugaya-taichou, did you really not think that she would follow you? That kido you cast is only good at keeping people _out_ not _in_ , you know."

My eyes widened in response. I hadn't even considered the possibility of you breaking out and following me. "Matsumoto, you handle Kira. I'm going back to central 46" I stated as I quickly turned around and rushed back to our previous location. All I could do was hope that I made it in time…

* * *

… _And when I got there, I realized that I was too late. There, lying motionless in a pile of blood on the floor, was you…._

* * *

"Oh, Hitsugaya-kun" I heard Aizen begin from behind me as I stared down at your motionless body. "I'm sorry you had to see that. Truly, I never intended for you to come back so quickly and find her this way. I guess I really should have cut her into little pieces and disposed of her while I had the chance."

"Aizen…" I growled as I continued to stare intently at you. "You did this…? Why? After everything… After everything she _did_ for you!? She admired you… So she trained so hard.. All these years… Just so she could become your vice-captain…Just so she could be of some use to you... And this is how you repay her!?"

"Now, Hitsugaya-kun" Aizen replied with a sinister smile on his face. "Don't you know? Admiration is the furthest thing from understanding. So, when it comes down to it, she did all that for a man she thought she understood but never did. Therefore, it's really her _own_ fault she ended up this way."

* * *

 _It was at that point that I lost it._

* * *

"Bankai!" I yelled as Hyorinmaru powers engulfed me and turned me into a replica of his ice dragon form. "You'll die here, Aizen!" I added as I charged at him with every ounce of strength I possessed.

* * *

 _But it wasn't enough… Within mere seconds, I was struck down and left for dead on the floor. Never have I felt as helpless as I did then…_

 _Fortunately, Unohana happened to be in central 46 at the time and managed to revive us before we lost too much blood. Truly, I don't think I could ever thank her enough for saving your life…_

 _While it only took me a few days to regain consciousness, more than a few weeks passed and you had still yet to open your eyes. Your injuries were a lot more serious than mine, after all, and you had been left to bleed out for longer than me, so it made sense that you would take longer to recover…_

 _...Or, at least, that's the justification Unohana gave me. All I remember is staring down at your unconscious body as you were only able to hold onto life thanks to the machine standing next to you…_

 _Even when I was deemed healthy enough to return to my captain duties, I still made sure to visit you whenever I could. After all these years of wasted time that we spent apart, I was determined to make sure no more time with you passed me by..._

 _There was also another thing that I vowed as I stared down at your motionless body: revenge._

 _To think that the man I had entrusted you to had gone and betrayed you to such an extent…. I was ashamed… and angry. I should have known what he was really like. I should have been able to prevent this… And yet all I could do was bleed out on the floor as the man that had betrayed my trust walked away scot-free with your blood on his hands…_

 _Never Again._

 _Never again will I entrust your protection to someone else. Never again will I entrust your happiness to someone else. No, never again will I ever entrust_ _you_ _to someone else._

 _After that day, I knew that if I ever wanted you to be truly happy, I had to secure that happiness for you myself. And I was willing to do whatever it took to make sure you were happy._

 _But, before I could do that, there was somebody I had to kill..._

* * *

 **Wow, what a chapter to write!**

 **Finally, it seems like Hitsugaya is out of his rut and is back to the protective and powerful guy we've all grown to love!**

 **Honestly, after the sadness of the last chapter, I really wanted to update quickly so I wouldn't be leaving the story on a sad note for too long.**

 **Plus, now I don't have to pretend to show Aizen in a good light! Thank god, because boy, do I hate that bastard...**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing! And I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**


	10. Chapter 10: Awaiting the Battle

**Welcome to chapter 10 of _To Be With You_!**

 **I know this is a bit late in comparison to my usual update time, but I had a little case of writers block, so I hope that you'll all forgive me!**

 **Anyway, without further delay, here's the chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 10: Awaiting The Battle

 _Once the Seireitei recovered from the initial shock of Aizen's betrayal, they were quick to take action. Only a few weeks had passed since he left, and the head captain was already preparing an attack force that was to be situated in Karakura town. And because of Matsumoto's constant insistence that we go, it was eventually decided that I was to lead this attack force while preparing for the battle to come._

 _To be honest, I was conflicted when I heard the news of my new mission. On one hand, being stationed in Karakura would allow me to fight the Arrancar on the front lines and better prepare myself for the final battle. Plus, the idea of killing Aizen's subordinates was really appealing…_

 _But deep down, I still didn't want to go. Because I knew that if I left for Karakura, I would also be leaving you. And after everything that happened between us before you fell into a coma, I desperately wanted to make sure that I was the first person to see you when you woke up…_

 _However, as you know all too well, the head captain's decisions are final. So when the order came for me to leave the Seireitei… to leave you… all I could do was obey._

 _And then, barely two weeks after I was first stationed in Karakura, you woke up and asked to speak with me…_

* * *

 _Flashback, Thinking of You_

"So, that's Aizen's plan…" I muttered to myself as I thought over what the head captain had just told us. I then turned to face Matsumoto and added "Matsumoto, we should go now and inform Madarame and Ayasegawa about this."

"Right" she said before heading towards the door. "Orihime, you should find Ichigo and let him know too."

Inoue nodded in response before following Matsumoto out of the room. And just as I was about to exit as well, the head captain spoke again.

"Now, before you go, Hitsugaya-taichou" he began as I turned to face him once more. "There is someone here who has been waiting patiently to speak with you."

* * *

 _And just as I was about to ask who it was, the words tied in my throat. Because, just at that moment, you stepped out from behind the head captain and walked towards the camera…_

* * *

"H-Hinamori…" I stuttered as I stared at you in shock. "Y-You're awake…"

You nodded in response. "Yeah… I woke up a few days ago…" you replied as you smiled weakly at me.

"Ah, I see…" I said as I started to take in your appearance. "So… how are you feeling?"

"Oh, I'm feeling a lot better now" you answered as you continued to smile at me. "I'm pretty much good as new. See?" you added as you motioned to several parts on your body. "I'm fine."

"That's good to hear…" I replied as I offered you a slight smile.

* * *

 _But the thing is, you weren't fine. And it was obvious that you weren't to anyone who looked at you._

 _Because you looked like someone who was on the brink of death..._

* * *

After hesitating for a moment, you spoke again. "I'm sorry, Hitsugaya-kun…" you began as you lowered your gaze to the floor. "I… I doubted you. I accused you… And I… attacked you. I'm so sorry, Hitsugaya-kun… And I understand if you never want to see me again. Really, I'm such a-"

"Oi, I've already forgotten about all that and so should you." I interrupted, which caused you to look back up at me once again. "That's behind us, alright? So don't worry about it and just get back to bed, would you? Go and get rid of those bags under your eyes."

"Hitsugaya-kun…" you whispered as tears began to form in your eyes. "Yeah... I'll do that… Thank you…" you added as you began to wipe away your newly fallen tears with your hands.

* * *

 _The truth was… I hadn't actually forgotten about what happened between us at all. In fact, it weighed heavily on my mind every time I thought about seeing you after you first woke up._

 _But, that wasn't because I blamed you for what happened. No, I never blamed you for what he put you through…_

 _I was just worried that you still blamed me._

 _I didn't know what I would do if you still thought of me as a traitor…. All I did know was that I would do whatever it took to convince you otherwise._

 _Fortunately, it never came to that. And the second I heard you apologize to me about what happened, an immense sense of relief flooded into me. You were still the person I always knew you to be…_

 _I guess I really should have believed in you more._

* * *

"Because, you know" I said as I watched you wipe the tears of relief from your eyes. "You already look like a kid. I mean, look at Matsumoto. You'd have to sleep for a hundred years to catch up to her."

Hearing this, you immediately stopped what you were doing. "H-Hey!" you exclaimed as you pouted at me. "That's not fair! Rangiku-san's a freak of nature and you know it! And like you're one to talk about growing, Hitsugaya-kun!"

"Hinamori!" I shouted back, annoyed that _you_ of all people had mentioned my height. Once I had your full attention, I sighed and then added with a slight smirk "How many times do I have to tell you? It's not Hitsugaya- _kun_ anymore. It's Hitsugaya- _Taichou_ now."

* * *

 _You simply nodded back at me with a small smile on your face. And after a moment had passed, you spoke again_.

* * *

"Say, Hitsugaya-kun… Can I ask you something?" you quietly asked as your gaze shifted off to the side.

"Hmm? Sure, anything." I responded as I looked at you with a mixture of confusion and curiosity.

"Are you going to… _fight_ Aizen-Taichou?" you asked as you refused to meet my gaze. "And are you going to _kill_ Aizen-Taichou?"

"Yes, I am" I stated in response. "After what he did-"

"Please…" you interrupted as you lifted your head to look at me once again. "Please, don't kill Aizen-taichou! I know that what he did was bad… but… There's just no way he would do something like that! Someone has to forcing him to… Yeah, that's it! I bet Ichimaru and Tosen are forcing him to-"

* * *

 _But I never got to hear the rest of what you were going to say. Because, before you had a chance to finish, the head captain used a powerful kido spell on you to take your consciousness from you._

* * *

"I apologize for this, Hitsugaya-Taichou" he said as he held your limp form. "I only granted her request to speak with you because she was so desperate, but it appears that it was too soon…"

"It's fine" I replied a little too quickly before bowing to my superior. "I appreciate you letting her speak with me. And now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be taking my leave."

"Hitsugaya-Taichou-" he began in response but was cut off as I ended the transmission.

All alone in the room once more, the only thing I could do was clench my fist in anger. "Aizen…" I muttered to myself as I thought back on the conversation I just had with you. "I _will_ kill you for this…"

* * *

 _For the few weeks that passed after that day, I just couldn't get you off my mind. It seemed like no matter what I tried to distract myself with, be it training, hollow hunting, or exploring the world of the living, it just didn't matter… Because my thoughts would always return to you all the same._

 _It was during this time that I also managed to find a spot in the world of the living that reminded me of all those times we spent watching the sunset together in Junrinan all those years ago. It was a nice spot that overlooked the rest of the town and offered the best view of the sunset…. I'm sure you would have loved it._

 _And maybe it was because of how strongly I associated the place with you that I subconsciously found myself wandering there every evening as the sun was about to go down. At first, as soon as I realized where I was going, I would immediately turn around and head back to where I was staying. But eventually, I just gave in and decided to sit on the fence and quietly watch the sunset before me… The sunset that reminded me of you._

 _I continued to do this for quite some time. And eventually, I found myself looking forward to my daily visit to this area overlooking the town. It was just so calm… warm… and peaceful. Just like you…_

 _But then again, I guess the spot was more well-known than I thought it was, since this girl kept bugging me whenever I was there._

* * *

"Hey, Toshiro, I knew you'd be here!" I heard a female voice shout from off to the side as rushing footsteps could be heard coming in my direction. "Looks like you're back again, huh?"

"Go away" I harshly replied without even turning to look at her. "Can't you see that I want to be alone?"

"Oh, come on, Toshiro, don't be like that!" she exclaimed as she finally caught up to where I was sitting. "Besides, if you really wanted to be alone, you wouldn't be hanging out here waiting for me to finish soccer practice, now, would you?"

"How many times do I have to tell you," I began with a sigh. "That's not why I'm here. Besides, who'd want to wait around for a kid like you?"

"Hey! Did you honestly have to put it like that!?" she shouted back at me. "And my name's not _Kid_ , it's Karin Kuro-"

"Don't care" I interrupted as looked down at my soul phone as it scanned the area for hollows. "Just leave me alone"

"But Toshiro, we're friends, aren't we?" she replied as she place a hand on my shoulder. "After all, we're going to play soccer together in the match this Saturday, right?"

"I don't remember ever agreeing to that" I bluntly replied as I brushed her hand off my shoulder.

"But you keep coming here! So you must have _some_ interest in playing with us!" she retorted with a smug look on her face.

"I already told you," I began as I closed my soul phone and looked at her for the first time that evening. "That's not why I'm here."

"Then why do you keep coming here?" she questioned as she looked at me in curiosity.

"The reason is because…" I replied as I turned my attention to the sunset enveloping the town below. "...this place has the best view of the sky. It brings back… memories."

* * *

 _And at this, I couldn't help but let loose a small smile as I began to lose myself in the memories and moments I spent with you all those years ago. Back to when it was just us, and only us…. And no one else._

 _Before Aizen… Before the betrayal… And before everything that happened in between._

 _Back to when I was yours and you were mine…._

* * *

"You know, when you talk like that, you sound like you're really old." the girl blurted out all of a sudden, causing me to be pulled away from reliving my memories of you.

Without another word to her, I abruptly stood up and began to walk away.

"H-Hey! Where are you going!?" I heard her shout from behind me as I continued to walk away from her.

"Somewhere else" I replied without stopping.

"U-Um, can I come too?" she asked as I began to hear her footsteps follow after me.

"Now that would defeat the purpose of me leaving, would it?" I answered as I neared the path that lead back into town.

"H-Hey! That's not fair!" I heard her shout from behind me. "Well, will you at least come to the game on Saturday?"

I merely shrugged as I continued on my way into town.

* * *

 _And before I knew it, the date of the final battle got closer and closer…_

 _Which meant that the day where I was finally going to avenge you was soon going to arrive._

 _...Or, at least, that's what I thought at the time._

 _If only I knew then that what I was counting down to wasn't the day where I was going to avenge you, but to the day where I was going to hurt you in the worst way imaginable…._


	11. Chapter 11: Forgive Me

**Welcome to Chapter 11 of _To Be With You!_**

 ** _I know it's been a long time since I updated. To be completely honest, it was pretty hard to stay motivated to write once Bleach ended..._**

 ** _But I'm back now! At least for the next little while!_**

 ** _I gotta say, reading your reviews really gives me the motivation to keep writing. And x1999Kamui, your review was so touching that I just had to update! This chapter goes out to you!_**

 ** _Anyway, here's to the continuation!_**

* * *

Chapter 11: Forgive Me

 _It wasn't too long after my encounter with that persistent girl that we got the news that Inoue Orihime had apparently joined forces with Aizen. And when that happened, it didn't take long for the head captain to order Matsumoto, Madarame, Ayasegawa, Kuchiki, Abarai, and me back to the Seireitei. Too bewildered at what was happening, I didn't question my new orders and quickly returned to the Soul Society._

 _While I can't claim to have known Inoue Orihime all that well, I feel that I can still say with utmost sincerity that she wouldn't have joined Aizen of her own free will. There was just something about her and the way she treated those dear to her that made me certain that there was more to the situation than what we were being told. After all, her kindness and cheerful personality reminded me of you… and I knew you wouldn't betray me so easily._

 _But, regardless of my suspicions, I didn't question the head captain's orders and quickly returned to the Seireitei. Why, you ask? Well, that's because returning to the Seireitei would let me see you again. And after our last encounter, I desperately needed to see you…_

 _If only they had let me._

* * *

 _Flashback, I'm so sorry_

"What do you mean _I can't see her_?!" I yelled at the guard that was preventing me from entering the squad four hospital room that was keeping you captive. "I _demand_ that you let me in!"

"I-I apologize, Hitsugaya-taichou" the fourth division squad member stuttered as he tried to stand his ground against my growing temper. "But that's the head captain's and Unohana-Taichou's orders. Until she can say guarantee that Hinamori-fukutaichou is really on our side, n-no one's allowed in or out of this room..."

"...Are you suggesting that Hinamori is a _traitor_?" I growled back as I felt myself losing control of my spiritual pressure.

The guard then began to pale. "N-No! That's not…. Well, you know… After what she said to you-" he started but was cut off as I glared at him.

"Oh? And what _did_ she say?" I responded as I leaned in closer to the guard. "Because if I remember correctly…. _you_ weren't there."

"Y-Yes, t-that's true." he stuttered as he tried to back away from me, only to be stopped by the wall behind him. "B-But, I-I heard from-"

"Well, unless the person you heard it from was the head captain himself…" I began as I continued to glare at the fourth division officer. "Then that person _wasn't_ there either, huh? So what makes you think that they would know any more about the situation than _I_ do?"

"W-Well, for starters…" he responded, oblivious to the fact that he was just further digging his own grave. "T-They don't… I-I mean, they aren't _in love_ with Hinamori-Fukutaichou… So they can-"

Before I could lose control of my anger in response to his comment, I felt a hand being placed on my shoulder. "Hitsugaya-taichou, please excuse my subordinate. He was only following my and the _head captain_ 's orders." Unohana said gently as she looked from me to her officer. "You may leave now, Kirigiri-san" she added before the guard gratefully left the area as fast as he could.

"Unohana…" I muttered as I turned to look at her. "Let me in to see her…"

"I'm afraid I can't." she curtly replied as she removed her hand from my shoulder. "Until she can convince the head captain of where her loyalties lie, I cannot allow anyone to see her… And that includes you, Hitsugaya-taichou."

"But this is just ridiculous!" I yelled as I slammed my fist against the wall. "Hinamori _isn't_ a traitor! She would never betray us! She's just…just... This is all HIS fault! If it weren't for _him_ , this wouldn't have happened! If it weren't for _him_ , she never would have said that! If it weren't for him… she…" I then paused for a second before adding "...she wouldn't have been _damaged_ this badly…"

"I can understand how you feel, Hitsugaya-taichou. I am the one who has been taking care of her, after all. So I can see firsthand the extent of the damage that Aizen Sousuke has inflicted upon her." Unohana replied in a gentle tone. "However, acting the way that you are now will only end up hurting her more in the end. Right now, she needs to prove to everyone that she is _not_ Aizen's puppet. And unless she does this on her own, people will continue to question her loyalties behind her back. So please, for her sake, I need you to be patient. You and I both know that she isn't a traitor, but until the rest of the Seireitei agrees with us, we need to let her be. As painful as it may be, this is one battle that you can't fight for her."

"But she shouldn't have to go through this…" I muttered as I stared at the crack my fist had made in the wall. "Why…. Why her?!"

"The only thing we can we now" Unohana began as I dragged my gaze away from the wall and up to her "is to be ready for the final battle to come. Even if she can't be cleared before the showdown with Aizen, his defeat will definitely speed up the process. So, the only thing you can do for her now is help her take vengeance against the one who wronged her."

"Oh, Believe me, I intend to" I replied before leaving the fourth division captain alone and beginning the make my way back to my own division. "That bastard will pay…"

"Hitsugaya-taichou, please keep this in mind" I heard Unohana call out from behind me, halting me in my tracks. "If you were to lose your life in the pursuit of this vengeance, this would cause Hinamori-fukutaichou a huge blow that she may never be able to recover from. So, please, do not let your rage blind you from what is most important."

All I gave in response was a wave and a nod before continuing on my way.

* * *

 _After that, I spent the rest of the afternoon training. I needed to blow off some steam._

 _My goal then was to train as much as possible before the final battle. I couldn't afford to let the same outcome as last time happen again._

 _But, as fate would have it, all the time I would have was that one afternoon. Since later on that night, we received some crucial news._

* * *

"Taichou! Wake up!" I heard Matsumoto yell from outside my room, waking me instantly. "We have to get ready!"

"Huh….? For what?" I grumpily asked, still half asleep. "I swear, if this is for one of your drunken adventures, I will-"

"That's not it, Taichou!" she replied, clearly annoyed. "Ichigo and his friends went to Hueco Mundo to save Orihime! The Head Captain's calling for an emergency meeting right now! I think the final battle might be tomorrow!"

* * *

 _Now that had gotten my attention. I quickly got out of bed and threw on my Shinigami garbs before rushing out of my room. Matsumoto was quick to follow me as we headed to the first division._

 _And as it turns out, Matsumoto was right. The final battle was to be tomorrow in a replication of Karakura town._

 _In the mayhem of trying to organize my squad for the upcoming battle, I didn't have the chance to see you before I left. Granted, it's not like I would have been allowed to anyway, but still._

 _Anyway, before I knew it, I was facing down the third ranked Espada in battle…._

* * *

"You've done well to evade my attacks so far, boy." the blonde Espada stated as her sword clashed with mine. "But remember, if you slip up for even a second, I will have you head."

"Wouldn't dream of it" I replied as I pushed her back. _These Espada are on a whole other level compared to those guys we fought before_ I thought as I braced myself for another attack. _I need to focus and look for an opening if I want to win this._

* * *

 _Suddenly, I heard a huge blast coming from where I knew Matsumoto to be fighting. Bewildered, I spared one look over there to make sure she was okay._

 _And that's when I spotted you…_

* * *

"Just now," the Espada began as she charged at me once again. "You're spiritual pressure spiked."

"...What are you talking about?" I lied as I blocked her attack, all the while trying to get my spiritual pressure back under control.

"What happened?" she asked as she pushed me back. "It must be important, for it to distract you so much."

"The hell if I know" I answered as I push and jumped back. _I need to focus_ I thought to myself as I caught my breath. _I can't afford to mess up now._

* * *

 _But no matter how much I tried, I just couldn't separate my thoughts from you._

 _You were here. You were fighting…. Were you really okay? Why were you here?_

 _These constant thoughts were clouding my judgement; I just couldn't focus. And when I felt Matsumoto's spiritual pressure abruptly disappear, and then yours soon after, I was prepared to rush over there and abandon my current fight. Fortunately, Kira and Hisagi were nearby and quickly came to your aid. Once I got the go-ahead from Kira that you both were going to be alright, I then turned back around to finish this fight once and for all._

 _And before I knew it, I was staring down the man I had sworn to kill…_

* * *

"Aizen…" I began as I pointed my blade at him. "You who swings their sword out of greed and hatred…. You were never worthy of ever being called a captain of the Gotei 13. A true captain fights for duty and honour, and because of that, it is our moral duty to stop you!"

"Oh, is that so?" Aizen replied with a small laugh and a knowing smirk. "Are you implying that _you_ don't have an ounce of hatred in your blade, Hitsugaya-kun? After all, out of all of the current captains of the Gotei 13, you surely hate me the most. Or did that hatred go away the second _Hinamori-kun_ showed up alive and well?"

"Ah, you're right, Aizen. My blade _is_ full of hatred. Something truly unworthy of a captain of the Gotei 13." I growled as my spiritual pressure began to rise. "But I'll deal with that later, even if it means resigning as a captain. So for now, know this, Aizen, I didn't come here to fight you…. I CAME HERE TO VIOLENTLY HACK YOU TO PIECES!"

* * *

 _And with that statement, I unleashed my Bankai and charged at him with everything I had. All of the rage and hatred I had felt in the last few months came out all at once as I tried desperately to avenge you. It didn't take long for the other captains to join me in the assault against Aizen._

 _And then, in the midst of all the fighting, I saw it. An opening. I then charged at Aizen once again, knowing that Hirako would cover me during my assault…. And it worked. I had finally dealt a mortal blow to the man who had caused you so much suffering. I thought I won. I thought I had finally avenged you._

 _Except, it wasn't him that I stabbed. It was you._

* * *

"H-Hina… mori?" I whispered as I stared at you in disbelief. _Why are you here?_ I thought so myself. _Where's Aizen!? This can't be happening! There's no way I… I didn't…. No..._

I then heard the screams of Kira and Hisagi from down below. Their screams were able to pull me away from my thoughts long enough to remove my sword from your chest and release you from the ice prison I had thought I cast on Aizen.

I still couldn't bring myself to speak. All I could do was cradle you in my shaking arms as I lowered us to the ground.

"S-Shiro… Chan…" you muttered with all the strength you had left. "W-Why…?"

* * *

 _I don't remember what happened next. All I remember is a hoarse scream erupting from my within me as I charged full force at Aizen…._

 _And then everything went black._

 _The next thing I knew, I was staring at the ceiling of a squad four hospital room. And even in the midst of all the chaos that ensued once one of the fourth division's officers had noticed I woke up, there was only one thought on my mind…_

 _I killed you._


	12. Chapter 12: Recovery

Chapter 12: Recovery

 _Throughout the first few weeks after I woke up, I couldn't bring myself to eat nor sleep. I could do nothing on my own. And that's not because I lacked the ability to do so, it was because I just didn't see a point in striving to live anymore. After all, you had died, and by my hand, so what right did I have to live?_

 _I ended up secluding myself in my recovery room. Whenever someone stopped by, I wouldn't pay them any mind and just continued to stare out the window as though they weren't even there at all. This annoyed Matsumoto to no end, and eventually led to her breaking one of flower vases in the room in order to get my attention. But I couldn't even bring myself to care about that…. All that mattered was you. And you were dead._

 _It was all pointless. Sure, we had succeeded in defeating Aizen, but what was the point of that if you weren't around to see it? And even HE had managed to escape the battle alive… So why did you have to die…_

 _Even though I was in no mental state to do anything, eventually Kyoraku decided that it was time to talk to me about the consequence of my actions in the fight against Aizen…_

* * *

 _Flashback, Picking Up the Pieces_

"Hitsugaya-taichou, I'm coming in" Kyoraku stated before entering the room. I didn't offer him an answer as he entered the room and sat down in the chair next to my bed.

After a moment had passed, he spoke again. "It seems that your physical injuries have pretty much healed. So you should be able to get out of here soon. I bet you're happy about that, huh?" he said as he tried to get me to open up to him. "As great as squad four is, this place is just too depressing. I have no idea how Unohana manages to work here day after day."

Again, I said nothing in response as I continued to stare out the window.

"Look, Hitsugaya-taichou, let's just cut to the chase, shall we?" the squad eight captain began again once he realized that I wasn't going to engage in any small talk. "I'm here to talk about what you said to Aizen. You said that you were ready to forsake your duties as a captain of the Gotei 13 and even resign from your position if it meant being able to kill him. As I'm sure you know, as another captain of the Gotei 13, I can't exactly let a comment like that slide."

"... So what?" I finally spoke. "I take it you already reported me to the head captain. Am I suspended?"

"No." he replied. "In fact, I'm the only one who knows and I haven't told anyone about what you said. I figured it was best to talk to you about it first."

"Is that so…" I mumbled as I continued to stare out the window.

"Look, Hitsugaya, we've got to talk about this" he urged as he tried to get my attention once more. "As much as you might not want to, we _need_ to talk about this. I understand that it was probably just said in the heat of the moment, but it's still-"

"It wasn't" I interrupted. "I meant every word. And I still do."

"Damnit, Hitsugaya!" he yelled as he slammed his on the nightstand next to him. "You can't keep acting like this! It's been three weeks since you woke up! I get that Hinamori-kun was important, but this is just ridiculous! You need to move on-"

"What the hell do you know!?" I yelled back as I finally faced him for the first time. "Do you know what it's like?! To have the one you wanted to protect the most die by your hand!? Well, do you!? So until you can say that you do, don't you say anything about what I should or shouldn't do!"

"While I can't say that I know what it's like to kill someone dear to you," Kyoraku replied as he regained control of his anger. "I do know what it's like to lose someone precious to you at the hands of Aizen Sosuke. Do you remember the visored called Lisa? She was once my lieutenant, before she was transformed into a visored at the hands of Aizen. Until I saw her at the final showdown, I thought she was dead."

"Well at least she survived in the end!" I answered, not one drop of sympathy in my voice. "Hinamori's dead and no miracle will bring her back!"

"I wouldn't be so quick to say that…" the eighth division captain whispered under his breath, just loud enough for me to hear.

"...What was that?" I asked, my anger starting to fade away. "Did you just say that there's a chance Hinamori's alive?"

"Darn, I wasn't supposed to tell you that…" he muttered to himself as he scratched his chin. "Look, let's just pretend I didn't say that, okay?"

"Oh no, that's not going to happen" I replied as I grabbed his robes in my hand and pulled him close to me. "You're going to tell me _exactly_ what you meant by that."

"Sheesh, looks like I have no choice then." he answered as he lowered his hand. "Alrighty then. Well, for starters, Hinamori-kun didn't die during the battle with Aizen. In fact, she's still breathing as we speak."

* * *

 _I instantly released his garbs as I widened my eyes in shock. You were alive. I didn't kill you. You were alive and well and-_

* * *

"... Well, at least for now" he finished before straightening out the wrinkles my grip had caused in his clothing.

"W-What do you mean… for now?" I slowly said as I felt my hopes starting to fall once again.

"See, this is why I wasn't supposed to tell you…" he muttered as he tried to find some way to explain the current situation. "You see, while she's still technically alive, her condition is still uncertain and she hasn't woken up yet. So out of the spirit of not giving you any false hope, we decided not to tell you anything until everything was certain. After all, there was no point in making you relive her death twice."

"I-I see…" I whispered as I tried to process this new information. _So then there's still a chance that I did kill her_ I thought to myself.

"Well," Kyoraku began after a moment had passed. "That's about all I came to say. Oh, and don't let anyone know I told you, okay? Old man Yama will be pissed if he finds out I told you."

All I could do was nod as the eighth division captain got up and left the room.

* * *

 _For the rest of that afternoon, all I could do was think about what Kyoraku had told me. There was still a chance that you would live, even if you hadn't completely recovered yet._

 _And during that afternoon, I came to the following conclusion: that my fate would be tied to yours. If you lived, then I would do whatever it took to make it up to you. And if you died, then… well.. So would I._

 _I know what you're thinking. There's no way that you would want me to give up my life just because you had lost yours. But please try to understand. The weight of the knowledge that I had survived while you had died was just too much. If you died, then it only made sense that I should have as well. After all, we had made a pact to always stay together. I took that to mean even in death._

 _Anyway, the plus side to this was that until your fate was sealed, I was going to act as though you were going to live. And that meant putting all I had into recovering and getting stronger._

* * *

"Well, Hitsugaya-Taichou, I have to say" Unohana began as she checked my vital signs for the last time "You have managed to make an excellent recovery in the last two weeks. So I think it is safe to say that you are ready to return to your duties as the captain of squad ten."

"Thank you" I replied as I stood up and put on my captain's garb for the first time in months.

"That being said," she added as she put her medical tools away. "I do recommend that you take it easy for the next little while. Your wounds have healed, but your body is still weak from inactivity. So try not to push yourself too hard for the next two weeks. And that means no training."

I simply nodded in response before leaving the room.

* * *

 _There's no way I could have told her that I had no intention of following her advice. After all, there was still so much I had to before you woke up._

 _If you woke up._

 _In any event, it didn't take long for me to get back into the normalities of everyday life as captain of the Gotei 13. Kyoraku never did tell anyone about what I had said on the battlefield. I guess he just figured that everyone would be better off if we pretended like the whole thing never happened._

 _That or he didn't want to risk me telling on him about letting it slip that you were still technically alive. I guess either reason works._

 _Anyway, I figured that in the meantime, the best thing for me to do was train. I needed to get stronger, strong enough so that I could finally protect you. And it was in this training that I finally achieved it. My true Bankai._

 _Unfortunately, my current body was unable to withstand the true power of my bankai. So it left me with only one choice: I had to age myself. Don't ask me how I did it, truth be told, I'm still not entirely sure how I did it myself. But once I felt myself get more in tuned with Hyorinmaru, it just sort of… happened. And when it did, I knew that it was the solution I needed._

 _And so I started to train this new form in order to perfect my completed bankai. I had to make sure it was ready in time to protect you when you woke up._

* * *

"I see…" I muttered to myself as I stared down at the frozen boulder before me. "So it takes about 10 seconds for me to will something completely frozen in this form. Hmm… That's no good, it takes too long to be useful in combat. Now, maybe if I brought it down to 4 seconds then-"

"Taichou!" I heard someone yell from outside the cavern I was training in. "Taichou, where are you!?"

Recognizing the voice as Matsumoto's, I sighed before beginning to make my way back towards the entrance. "What do you want, Matsumoto? I'm busy training right now." I said as I exited the cave.

"Taichou!" she yelled as she rushed over to me. "I just heard from squad four. It's about Hinamori. She-"

* * *

 _I didn't hear the rest. Because the second she said your name, I immediately bolted to the fourth division._

* * *

"Where is she?!" I demanded as I stared down a squad four officer. "Tell me where she is NOW!"

The officer stared at me dumbfounded for a few seconds. "W-Wha… Who.. are you talking about?" he finally managed to spit out.

"Hinamori, Damnit!" I urged as I started to glare. "Who else would I be talking about!? Now tell me where the hell is she!"

"S-She's in room 214…" he stuttered under the pressure of my gaze. "If you go down that hallway, then you'll reach-"

* * *

 _Once again, I didn't hear the rest. Because as soon as I got the information I needed, I sprinted down the hallway to find you._

 _The second I reached the door that said 214, I immediately swung it open. Everyone in the room then suddenly turned around to see face me. And one of those people was you._

 _I couldn't think. I couldn't speak. And before I knew it, I was suddenly engulfing you in a desperate hug. I was so happy… You didn't die… I didn't kill you… You were alive…._

* * *

"Hinamori…" I muttered into your hair as I felt the sting of tears welling up in my eyes. "I-I'm so glad…. I thought I lost you…."

"S-Shiro… Chan?" I heard you mutter in my ear.

"I'm so, so sorry…" I continued as my grip on you tightened. "I should have known… I was supposed to protect you… And yet I…. I…"

"It's okay…" you whispered as I felt your arms wrap around me. "I just heard about everything from Unohana-taichou. It wasn't your fault…"

"Hinamori, I swear" I began as I pulled away from you enough so I could properly face you. "I will do _whatever_ it takes to make sure you never get hurt like this again. I swear, I will protect you."

* * *

 _As you looked back at me, I noticed your face start to turn a light shade of red._

* * *

"Is something wrong…?" I asked as I stared intently at you. "Are you feeling okay?! I'll go get Unohana and she-"

"N-No, that's not… it" you muttered as you looked off to the side. "It's just… um… You're so..."

* * *

 _A millions thoughts were running through my head at that moment. What was I? Was I hurting you? Were you scared of me now? Was I-_

* * *

"...big." you finished as you continued to refuse to meet my gaze.

* * *

 _And then I remember that I was still in my adult form._

* * *

"O-Oh, well, um, you see…" I began as I suddenly let you go. "I, uh, well… My body couldn't withstand the pressure of a perfected Hyorinmaru. So I had to age myself to continue my training… Why? Is there something wrong with the way I look?"

"N-No, that's not what I was… Um…" you replied as you tried to get your thoughts in order.

"Hitsugaya-Taichou" I heard someone from behind me interrupt. "Hinamori-fukutaichou just woke up and is incredibly overwhelmed. I won't ask how you knew of her condition or how you knew that she had woken up just now. In turn, I ask that you leave us be so that she may get some rest."

"A-Alright. That's fair…" I answered the fourth division captain before resuming my attention back to you. "I'll be back as soon as I can, Hinamori. Take care until then"

All I got in response from you was a nod before being escorted out by Unohana.

* * *

 _After that day, I visited you every chance I got. Sure, I still dedicated a lot of my time to training, but I always made sure to find time to spend with you._

 _Some days, I even multi-tasked. And by that, I mean that I decided to visit you while still in my adult form from my training earlier. It was like killing two birds with one stone: I was training my body to support this form for longer periods of time all the while spending time with you. It really seemed was the perfect plan._

 _Except, I got the feeling that you didn't like my adult form too much. Because whenever I would show up still in it, you would always get flustered and find some excuse to cut our time short…._

 _I hate my adult form._


	13. Chapter 13: Possibilities

Chapter 13: Possibilities

 _Fortunately, it didn't take you very long to be cleared from squad four after you woke up. It seemed like within a few weeks, things were back to the way they were: I was the captain of squad ten, and you were my childhood friend, the lieutenant of squad five. After all the chaos that ensued after Aizen's betrayal, it felt so nice to return to some form of normality._

 _Well, I guess some things were different. After all, you did have a new captain now. Sure, he could be a bit of an ass at times, but he was still way better than your previous captain (though I guess that's not a very high bar to clear). And he didn't seem to be any kind of romantic rival for me, either, so that was another plus._

 _But that wasn't the only change._

 _You started to act differently around me for some reason. Even when I wasn't in the adult form I swear you hated, you would still act weird when I was around. I remember that you would start to panic whenever I would show up unexpectedly and then come up with some lame excuse to leave. Once more, there would be other times where I would catch you stare intently at me for no reason._

 _Honestly, I had no idea what to make of this. And whenever I would try to question you about it, you would just get even more flustered and practically run away from me. I knew you didn't hate me, since you said as much when you woke up, but I was starting to have my doubts…_

 _And then, one day when I was on my way back from a captain's meeting, I finally found out why you were acting so strange…._

* * *

 _Flashback, Just Maybe_

"I swear," I mumbled under my breath as I made my way back to the tenth division main office. "That must have been the most pointless captains meeting we've ever had. God, doesn't the head Captain realized that _some_ of us have better things to do than stand around debating what colours the new dining hall should be?"

I shook my head. The Head Captain could have some bizarre priorities at times.

I soon found myself nearing the corner concealing my office from me. With a sigh, I reached for the door handle, only to be interrupted by an expected familiar voice.

"Oh, Rangiku-san," I heard you say in a troubled voice. "I don't know what to do… This is bad. This is _really_ bad!"

"Calm down, Hinamori" Matsumoto replied in a soothing voice. "Alright? Now, tell me what's so bad."

There was then a pause where I imagined you were debating whether or not to tell Matsumoto about what was bothering you. And just as I was about to decide to enter the room, you spoke words that froze me in place.

"It's about Hitsugaya-kun..." you slowly answered.

* * *

 _Now, I know what you're thinking. This was obviously a private conversation between you and Matsumoto and the minute you started talking about me, I should have done the adult thing and gave you two privacy._

 _Well, I guess a portion of the brat kid that I was when we were younger was still inside of me, because rather than leaving you two alone, I decided to conceal my presence with kido and pressed my ear against the door as I intently listened in on your conversation._

* * *

"Okay…" Matsumoto resumed as she tried to approach the subject delicately. "So tell me what's wrong with Taichou."

"I-It's not him per say…." I heard you stutter through the wall. "It's just that… um… Ever since I saw him in that adult form of his, things between us have been…. Different. And I don't know what to do."

"Alright," Matsumoto began. "Different how?"

"Well… Um…" you mumbled. "It's just that… Ever since I saw him like that, it got me thinking. If that's really his adult form, then that means someday he'll look like that permanently, right? And… Um… If that's the case, then he'll be… He'll be… God, why did he have to be so…"

* * *

 _I then started to panic._

 _I knew it. I knew you hated my adult form. Why did I even bother to think that there was a possibility that you didn't? God, I was such an idiot. And now, you probably hated-_

* * *

"...hot." you finally concluded.

* * *

 _Now that was not the answer I was expecting._

 _Dumbfounded, all I could do was stare blankly at the door in front of me as the sound of Matsumoto's laughter erupted in the room._

* * *

"So that's what's troubling you?" Matsumoto blurted out between fits of laughter. "You think Taichou's hot? What's so wrong with that?"

"There's something _really_ wrong with that, Rangiku-san!" I heard you shout over my lieutenant's laughter. "And would you stop laughing so hard!? What if someone hears you!?"

"Alright, Alright" Matsumoto replied as she tried to calm herself down. "Now, tell me, what's so wrong with thinking that Taichou's adult form is hot?"

"Well, you see" you began as you regained your composure. "Hitsugaya-kun's always been… cute. Ever since we were kids, that's all he ever was: cute. And I mean cute in the way that you might find a little kid or a puppy."

* * *

 _Okay, now I didn't know whether I should be pleased or offended._

* * *

"And I was fine with that." you continued. "That's how things were. And even as we got older, he was still just cute little Shiro-chan. But then, when I saw how he's going to look when he's older… I didn't think of him as cute anymore. I thought he was hot. And that is _not_ okay. Shiro-chan's supposed to be cute, just cute, not hot! Oh god, Rangiku-san, what should I do?!"

"Relax, Hinamori." Matsumoto stated as she tried to calm you down. "It's alright. People's expectations of others change as they get older. So it's perfectly fine for your opinion of Taichou to change from cute to hot. That's normal."

"But it's not okay!" you urged in response. "At first, I was only conscious of him when he was in his adult form, but now… Even when he's not I can't help but notice…. Things. And then I can't help but wonder: has his hair always looked so soft? Were his eyes always so piercing? And then I just end up staring at him like an idiot! He's bound to have noticed it by now! Oh, Rangiku-san, what do I do!? I don't want things to get weird between us! And they're already starting to!"

"Well," Matsumoto began. "There's only really one thing that I can see that would make things awkward between you two. So, I've gotta ask: with as these new things you're noticing about Taichou, do you think that you might be starting to see him as more than _just_ a childhood friend?"

* * *

 _I then felt my breath get caught in my throat. I didn't know if I was ready to hear you answer to that question just yet. Because, depending on your answer, I wasn't sure if my heart could take it._

 _And then, after what seemed like an eternity, you finally answered her question._

* * *

"I-I've always seen Hitsugaya-kun as an important friend… Someone who I could rely on and would always be there for me. I had never thought of him as anything more than that…" you replied, completely unaware of the sudden heartache your words had just caused in me. "But now…. I don't know. And that scares me."

"Well, Hinamori, I'm not too sure what to tell you" my lieutenant admitted. "I mean, I can't exactly tell you how you should feel; this is something you need to sort out for yourself. So, I guess, the only bit of advice I can give you is this: spend the next little while really thinking about how you feel about Taichou. Is he really just a friend to you? One that you could happily see someday married to someone else? Or is he someone you want to keep to yourself? Someone that you feel yourself starting to fall in love with?"

"Y-You're right. I'll try to… figure that out." you hesitantly replied. "Thanks, Rangiku-san. For hearing me out."

"Anytime, Hinamori." she answered, which was then followed by a sound that I could only assume was noise caused by her giving you a quick hug. "Feel free to come back to me anytime with any problems you've got. I'll always be here to listen."

* * *

 _I took this as my sign to move away from the door as I heard you thank Matsumoto once again before beginning to make your way out of the room. With my kido spells still in place, I remained unseen as you opened the door and walked right by me on your way back to your division._

 _Meanwhile, I was desperately trying to wrap my head around what you just confessed. You found me attractive…. Hot, even. And not just that. You were also now debating whether or not you had feelings that extended beyond friendship towards me. I just couldn't believe it. All this time, I thought it was hopeless. That there was no way you'd ever think of me that way…._

 _But now, I starting to feel something I hadn't felt in a long time: hope. Hope that someday, you might actually feel the same way about me as I always felt about you._

* * *

"Taichou, I know you're standing there. You can drop the act now" Matsumoto suddenly blurted out, nearly shocking me enough to accidentally reveal myself. _Maybe if I just don't reply,_ I thought silently to myself. _She'll just think that she was mistaken and go back inside the office._

"And don't bother not replying" Matsumoto added, almost as though she could hear my thoughts. "You were due back from your meeting ten minutes ago. Now, drop the act or I'll start yelling about how you've been standing here the whole time. And a thousand yen says Hinamori is still close enough to hear me."

"...Fine." I finally answered as I cancelled the kido incantations that were keeping me hidden.

"Good, now let's go inside, shall we?" she ordered, almost as though _she_ the captain and _I_ was the lieutenant. But, nevertheless, I followed along and walked in the room with her right behind me.

Once we were settled in the room, it didn't take long for Matsumoto to start talking again. "So, Taichou," she began with a grin. "What are you gonna do?"

"...What am I going to do about what?" I coolly answered, trying desperately not to let Matsumoto read me like an open book.

"Oh, cut the crap, Taichou" my lieutenant bluntly replied, clearly irritated that I had even tried to deny that I knew what she meant. "You know exactly what I'm talking about. Hinamori, the girl that you've been hopelessly in love with for _years_ , is finally starting to see you as more than a friend! This is your chance! Your chance to finally show Hinamori that you're the guy she should be with! Oh, this is just so exciting!"

I said nothing in response as Matsumoto let out a pre-teen like squeal in her excitement. Despite the euphoria I was feeling, there was no way in hell I was going to mimic her behaviour.

"Oh, but Taichou, you better act fast" Matsumoto finally continued. "Your window of opportunity isn't going to last very long. Because, if Hinamori ends up deciding that she just sees you as a friend before you have a chance to make a move, then your chances of getting together with her are going to disappear. And there's no telling if you'll ever get another chance with her."

"Then are you suggesting that I should just go up to her and ask her out?" I asked after coming to the conclusion that she probably had a point about my window of opportunity being brief. As nervous as I was at the thought of it, I was determined that I'd be able to do it if it meant that I could be with you.

"God, no! Are you nuts!?" Matsumoto exclaimed, practically offended that I had even suggested that. "If you do that, you'll just scare her off! Weren't you listening? Hinamori said that she's not sure how she feels about you. So, if you suddenly go up to her and ask her out, you'll just make her even more confused! Plus, wouldn't you feel better if she came to love you on her own, and not because she felt like she had to because of your confession?"

"Okay, okay. You've made your point. I won't ask her out." I replied. "But, if not that, then what should I do? Or should I just leave her alone?"

"Oh you can't leave her alone!" she exclaimed once again. "If you leave her alone, you're risking her choosing to just stay friends. No, what you need to do is…." she then paused for a second, before a giant grin appeared on her face when she added "... seduce her."

"...Huh?" was all I could manage in response.

* * *

 _She wanted me to… seduce you? The mere thought of me coming up to you with some cheesy pick-up line was just ridiculous. How could I ever do that, considering how long we've known each other? All the things we had been through?_

 _I remember thinking that she must have been out of her mind._

* * *

"Don't "huh?" me, Taichou!" Matsumoto replied. "If you want Hinamori to notice you, then you need to show her that there's something about you worth noticing. And the only way you can do that is by seducing her!"

"N-No way." I bluntly stated. "There's no way in hell I'm going up to Hinamori and pulling some cheesy pick-up line bullshit. No way."

"But Taichou!" my lieutenant pleaded. "If you don't, then you might never get another chance with her! Besides, there are other ways of seducing a girl than just hitting on her with pick-up lines!"

"Like what?" I asked. "What else would constitute as seducing someone?"

"Well," she began. "That all depends on the person. For some people, serenading them with music works great. Others, all you need to do is strike a sexy pose and wink."

"...Can you honestly picture me doing either of those things to Hinamori?" I countered.

Then, Matsumoto paused for a second before bursting out into a fit of laughter.

"Now I can!" she said between fits of laughter. "Oh, God, Taichou. As funny as that would be, I don't think either of those things would work well for you."

"No shit" I replied, still annoyed that she had even suggested that in the first place.

"But I still do stand by what I said before!" Matsumoto retaliated, now starting to regain her composure after her sudden fit of laughter. "The way you seduce someone all depends on the target. So I'm sure you'll eventually find the perfect way to seduce Hinamori! You are a prodigy, after all."

* * *

 _All I did was grunt in response. Taking this a sign that the conversation was now over, Matsumoto returned to her seat on the couch as we both decided to tackle the mountain of paperwork awaiting us. Although it didn't take long before she "had to use the washroom" and decided to take a five hour break while she was at it…. I swear, that women will be the death of me._

 _But, despite how frustrating she could be when it came to completing paperwork, I knew she had a point. If I wanted you to return my feelings, then I had to make you notice me. And the only way to do that was to… seduce you._

 _And we both know how well that turned out…_

* * *

 **And there you have it! The 13th chapter of _To Be With You!_**

 **This story is finally nearing it's end. Excluding this one, I plan on writing three more chapters (give or take).**

 **And now you all have Hitsugaya's seduction techniques to look forward to in the next chapter! It'll be one hell of a chapter, I guarantee it.**

 **Anyway, thanks once again for reading and reviewing! It means so much to get feedback from you all. And if you have any suggestions on how Hitsugaya should go about seducing Hinamori, feel free to let me know in a review! I have a few ideas, but I'm always open to new ones!**

 **~H-Mira**


	14. Chapter 14: Seduction

**Hey Everyone, I'm back!**

 **I know it's been about three months since I last updated, but I've been pretty busy with school and family issues.**

 **But on the plus side! I finally know how I want to end this fanfic! So it shouldn't take that much longer for the final two chapters to be out!**

 **Anyway, without further delay, here's chapter 14!**

 **~ H-Mira**

* * *

Chapter 14: Seduction

 _After my conversation with Matsumoto, I spent the next few days trying to come up with ways to make you notice me. And I was drawing a blank. I didn't know the first thing about dating or flirting, so how the hell was I supposed to come up with the perfect way to seduce you? Not to mention that I had to do it in a subtle way so as not to scare you off, but still make it noticeable enough so that you actually notice me… God, why did this have to be so damn hard?!_

 _Eventually, I came to the conclusion that maybe it was best for me to just stick around and wait for an opportunity. Some break in conversation or another that would allow me to…. Show off? I guess? I swear, this was the most stupid thing…. But, if it meant a chance with you, I had to bear through it._

 _And so I commenced my operation…_

* * *

 _Flashback, Not so smooth_

"So you're out here training again, huh?" I asked as I looked around the squad five training grounds at the damage your zanpaktou had caused. "You only just got out of squad four, you know. So you should try and take it a little easy."

"Says the one who was out training the day after he was discharged." I heard your voice say from behind me. "So you're really not one to talk, Hitsugaya-kun."

"Yeah, well, my injuries weren't as bad as yours, so-" I began as I turned around to face you, only to lose my train of thought as soon as I saw you. Rather than your hair being in its usual bun, it was now cut short into a bob. "Y-You cut your hair…"

"Y-Yeah, I did…" you shyly replied. "I thought it was time for a change, you know? Plus, I… didn't want to wear that hair cloth anymore."

* * *

 _So now that cursed haircloth was finally gone. And, with that, so was the last remnant of Aizen from you…_

* * *

"Ah, I see…" I answered, trying hard not to show how happy I was that you had finally thrown that haircloth away. "Well, it, um… It looks good…"

"T-Thanks…" you stuttered in response. "At first, I wasn't so sure… I thought it might have been missing something… I don't know…"

* * *

 _That gave me an idea._

* * *

"Hmm, no, you're right." I said as I approached you. "It is missing a little something."

"O-Oh, really?" you asked, taken aback. "Like what?"

"Something like… This." I replied as I withdrew Hyorinmaru from his sheath and used his powers to conjure up a rose made of ice. I then placed the rose behind your left ear and added "There. Perfect".

* * *

 _A heavy silence then enveloped the air around us as you stared back at me._

* * *

"Um… Hitsugaya-kun…" you began as you looked shyly off to the side. "It's kind of… cold. And I think it's starting to melt…"

"O-Oh, yeah right. S-Sorry" I stuttered as I quickly removed the ice rose from your hair and internally facepalmed myself. _I'm such an idiot_ I remember cursing to myself. _What the hell was I thinking? Of course she wouldn't like that. Why the hell did I do that? Man, and they call me a genius..._

"A-Anyway, I should really get going…" you mumbled before turning to leave the training grounds. "See you around, Hitsugaya-kun." you added just before you shunpoed away.

* * *

 _Okay, so that was a completely and utter failure._

 _At the time, I couldn't help but realize that my current methods were getting me nowhere. I needed something,_ _anything,_ _to just… help. I needed help. And an opportunity._

 _And in times of need, isn't it just great when subordinates come to your aid?_

* * *

"Hinamori-fukutaichou! Are you still here?" I heard a voice call out from somewhere off to my left. Curious, I turned around to see one of your seated officers rush towards the training ground. "I-If so, I was wondering if you… wanted to go to the festival-"

The officer's words died in his throat as soon as he laid eyes on me.

"O-Oh, Hitsugaya-taichou… You're here." he resumed, half taken-aback and half scared. "I… Um… was just looking for Hinamori-fukutaichou…"

"Is that so?" I began as I started to glare at the seated officer. "And just what did you want to ask Hinamori?"

"N-Nothing, really…" he replied as he desperately tried to hide something behind his back. Having a feeling what it was, I quickly reached behind him and grabbed the flyer from his hands before he even had the time to blink.

"There's a festival going on this weekend in Jurinan, huh?" I said as a smirk made its way onto my lips. "Hinamori would definitely _love_ this. Thanks for letting me know. _I'll_ make sure to bring her."

"B-But I was going to…" I heard him mumble under his breath.

"Do you have something else to say, _officer_?" I asked with a menacing glare as I let out some of my spiritual pressure.

"N-Nothing! Nothing at all!" he stuttered under the heat of my glare.

"Good. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be taking my leave" I stated just before vanishing from the area.

* * *

 _Fortunately, I had a pretty good idea of where you had run off to. So it didn't take me long to track you down._

* * *

"Hinamori" I called out from directly behind you, nearly giving you a heart attack as you were making your way into the fifth division office.

"H-Hitsugaya-kun…" you began as you tried to regain your composure. "Don't scare me like that…"

"Oh… right. Sorry." I answered as I looked off to the side and ran my hand through my hair. "Anyway… There was something I wanted to ask you."

"Hmm? What is it?" you asked in response. "Was that why you were at the training ground earlier?"

"...Yeah. That's why." I lied, preferring not to tell you the real reason I was there. "A-Anyway, I was wondering…. Have you heard about the festival going on in Jurinan this Saturday?

"There's a festival!? Really!?" you excitedly asked. "Wow, I haven't gone to one of those in forever! And, as luck would have it, I have this Saturday off too!"

"Then it's settled. I'll drop by at around 6 and we can head off from there." I replied. _Well, that was easy_ I thought to myself as I turned to leave.

But before I could, I heard your voice from behind me.

"W-Wait a second… Pick me up…" you mumbled as I looked back at you. "So then.. Will it just be the t-two us going?"

* * *

 _In that instant, I panicked._

 _Sure, I wanted it to be the two of us, but…. How would you take it if I said that?_

 _So, instead I said…_

* * *

"Y-Yeah…. and Oba-san, of course" I stammered as I tried to play it cool. "I know she'd love it too, so…"

"A-Ah, yeah. She would..." you replied, with what I almost swore was a hint of disappointment in your voice. "Alrighty then, see you Saturday."

* * *

 _And with that, I left._

 _The days leading up to Saturday both passed by excruciatingly slow and breathtakingly fast. On one hand, I was looking forward to being able to spend the time with you…. And Oba-san. I couldn't remember the last time we went to a festival like this… Plus I figured it'd be a nice way to relax after a tiring week of paperwork._

 _But, on the other hand, I had never been more nervous for something before in my life. True, Oba-san would be there, so it wouldn't be a real date or anything…. But… I knew this was my one and only chance. If I couldn't convince you at the festival, then I probably never would..._

 _And that terrified me._

 _So much so, that even when Saturday came and I went to pick you up, I was so nervous that I couldn't bring myself to maintain a normal conversation with you. All I could do was nod in response as you lead our one-sided conversation, not trusting myself to not sound like a complete idiot._

 _Well, not saying anything at all was probably pretty stupid too. But you seemed happy enough to continue our one-sided conversation on your own, so I didn't see any harm in slowing letting my voice come back to me._

 _And it eventually did, once we met up with Oba-san and made our way to the festival. I guess having her around was enough to finally calm my nerves so I could relax a little and enjoy the night. In fact, it seemed like I wasn't the only one who felt that way. Even you seemed to relax a bit once we met up with Oba-san._

 _In any event, it didn't take long to get caught up in the atmosphere of the festival. Hell, we were there barely fifteen minutes and you were already excitedly dragging us from stall to stall…_

* * *

"Wow, look at this one!" you called out as you pointed to a flashy stall up ahead. "I bet they have some really cool stuff there!"

"Hinamori, can you slow down a bit? I think Oba-san could use some rest" I said as I looked over to my winded grandmother. She wasn't use to so much exercise, so all the walking around was starting to take a toll on her.

"Oh, sorry!" you replied with an apologetic look. "Say, how about we go sit down over there? I can even go back to the drink stall and get you some water."

"That would be lovely, dear. Thank you" Oba-san replied as she gratefully sat down. And with that, you took off back towards the food stalls while I stayed to keep Oba-san company.

"Feeling any better, Oba-san?" I asked as I sat down beside her.

"Yes, this is much better. Thank you" she answered with a smile. "Now, tell me, Toshiro. Why did you bring an old lady like me on your date with Momo? Surely you'd both rather spend the time just the two of you."

"D-Date?" I stammered in response. "J-Just what are you talking about, Oba-san? Hinamori and I are just-"

"Toshiro, I'm old, not blind." she cut me off before I could finish. "It's obvious that this was meant to be a date between the two of you, so don't you even try to deny it. Now tell me, why did you bring me along?"

"... I panicked." I answered in all honesty. "She asked me if it was going to be just the two of us, so I panicked and said that you were coming as well. Pathetic, I know. Especially after I finally worked up the courage to ask her, but… well…"

"It's fine, dear. You don't need to explain." she replied with a sweet smile. "Say, want me to fake back pains when she comes back? So you'll both finally have an excuse to be alone? I use to be quite the actress in my day, I'll have you know. I doubt she'll even suspect a thing!"

"I appreciate the offer, but it's alright" I said with a small laugh. "I was a little nervous at first, but I think having you around has definitely been for the best. Believe it or not, I could barely even speak before we came to pick you up."

"Oh, I don't need to believe you, dear. I saw it for myself firsthand." she added with a laugh. "But, I guess it's to be expected. After all, it's not exactly an easy thing to do."

"Yeah, tell me about it" I replied. "I mean, it's not like I can just go up to Hinamori and tell her that I've been hopelessly in love with her for as long as I can remember. I think it'll require a bit more tack than that.

"Yes, I would say-" Oba-san began, only to stop mid-sentence with a look of shock on her face.

* * *

 _And I knew that there was only one thing that could cause her to make a face like that._

 _Quickly, I whipped my head around to catch a glimpse of your kimono as you ran back into the crowd. With a nod from my grandmother saying that she was alright, I ran as fast as I could after you._

 _I couldn't believe it. You heard me. After all these years, you finally heard me._

 _And it just had to be like this…_

 _No, I had to catch you. I had to explain. Maybe, if I did, things would go back to the way they were before…. But that was probably wishful thinking._

 _I didn't know how much you had overheard, but clearly it had been enough. I just hoped it wasn't enough to ruin our friendship for good… Because I had already lost you once, I couldn't bear to lose you again._

* * *

"Hinamori, please!" I called out as I pushed my way through the crowd after you. "Hinamori!" However, I was doubtful that you would even hear me over the noise of the crowd.

As a continued to chase after you, I faintly noticed that we were nearing the end of the festival grounds. Knowing this would be my chance, I quickened my pace and the second I was out of the crowd, I used a flash step to catch your wrist.

"Hina...mori…" I gasped as I tried to catch my breath. "Listen, I-"

* * *

 _But then you looked back at me, with tears rolling down your cheeks…_

 _So I let go of your wrist…_

 _… and I knew I had lost you._


	15. Chapter 15: What's left of us

Chapter 15: What's left of us

 _I didn't know how to approach you after that night. Just the thought of seeing you made me sick to my stomach. I couldn't breath. I couldn't think. And whenever I did... No matter what I did... I'd be reminded of you. And whenever I thought of you, I would remember the face you made when I reached for your hand… the face of someone whose world was just torn apart._

 _Even now that face still haunts me._

 _I just didn't know what to do. On one hand, I knew we couldn't leave things as they were. But on the other… I just couldn't. I just couldn't bring myself to see you and have my heart broken all over again. It was painful enough on that night… I didn't think I could handle going through that again._

 _So I started to avoid you. And this proved to be surprisingly easy to do, since it seemed that you were avoiding me as well._

 _That is until one day, two weeks later, when you finally came to see me..._

* * *

 _Flashback, I'm Sorry_

"Okay, that's it!" I said to myself as I slammed my pen on my desk in anger. "As soon as Matsumoto comes back from her _pee break_ , she is getting an earful! No one can possibly need one that lasts nearly an hour!"

And then, I heard a quiet knock on my door. My immediate thought was that it had to be Matsumoto trying to brace herself for the grand lecture she knew she was about to get.

"Don't you dare think acting all quiet and innocent means you're going to get away scot free!" I yelled as I sat up from my chair and made my way towards the door. "I swear I've had enough of your excuses! Now get in here and help-"

"Hitsugaya-kun…" I heard you faintly whisper from the outside of the door. Even in a fit of anger, I had no trouble making out your voice. "Can I come in…?"

* * *

 _So shocked that you were actually here, I lost my ability to speak for a moment before eventually coming to my senses and opening the door to let you in. On the surface, you seemed so calm as though it was the most natural thing in the world for you to be here…_

 _But I knew better. The look in your eyes as you nodded and entered the room told me otherwise._

* * *

"Listen, Hinamori..." I started as you sat yourself down on the couch. "A-About what I just said, it wasn't-"

"It's alright, Hitsugaya-kun." you replied, cutting me off mid sentence with an exhausted smile. "I know…"

"Oh, well, um… Good, then." I managed in response as I sat myself opposite you.

* * *

 _I then took a moment to take in your appearance. Although it was faint, I could make out the small hidden bags under your eyes. You looked so tired, so exhausted. You looked as though you hadn't been sleeping well lately..._

 _Not that I could blame you. After all, I knew better than anyone that you had a lot to think over._

 _And judging by the a faint spark of determination that could be seen just beyond the layer of exhaustion in your eyes, it seemed as though you had finally come to your answer._

* * *

"Hitsugaya-kun…. A-About what happened… I…" you began, taking a small pause to regain your composure and determination so that you could look me in the eye. "I'm… I'm sorry..."

 _I knew it_ I thought to myself as I felt my insides begin to burn and the sting of tears trying to break through. _I mean, what other answer was I expecting? Of course she'd never-_

"...For everything I put you through." you finished. "I mean it, Hitsugaya-kun. I'm so, so sorry for everything I put you through… I was so cruel…"

 _Huh?_ I then thought to myself, dumbfounded. _What… What is she talking about? Her, cruel? Just what in the world is she-_

"You… you… were in love with me. And yet, I… Just stupid, stupid me…I acted as though you weren't and that we were just friends… That we both felt that way... That things were fine as they were..." you said as you stared down at the clenched fists in your lap, obviously trying not to cry. "And I kept telling myself that there was no way you felt that way about me. That it simply wasn't like that between us…"

"... But, deep down, I think I knew. I knew that you loved me... I'd probably always known… I mean, we've been together all our lives. It'd be weird if I _didn't_ notice..." you continued, letting lose a faint sob. "And yet I… I… acted as though you weren't. As though, if I ignored it and pretended like it wasn't true, then it would just go away…"

"And by doing that, I was hurting you…" you added. "By refusing to accept it, I kept denying your feelings and acting as though they didn't matter… Because they were inconvenient for me… It was so cruel… _I_ was so cruel… I'm sorry, Hitsugaya-kun. I'm so, so sorry… And I understand if you never want to see me again and I-"

"Hinamori!" I yelled, interrupting you before you could go on any further. "Just… Just answer me this. Do you... love me?"

"...Huh?" you exclaimed as you finally looked back up at me. "W-What…"

"Hinamori," I repeated with a half lazy smile. "Don't tell me you came all the way down here today without even an answer to that question? You come here with this grand old speech, saying how things were in the past… But tell me, Hinamori. How do you feel _now_? Do you love me…? Or not? It's a simple question."

"I-I… um…" you stuttered as your cheeks flashed a bright shade of pink. "I… I didn't think about that…"

"Seriously, Hinamori?" I replied with half a laugh. "You honestly didn't think to have an answer to that question? And to think you were put in the advanced class at the Academy…"

"H-Hey!" you pouted in response. "That's not fair! After what I did, I just didn't think I had that option anymore!"

"Well, Hinamori Momo," I said in all seriousness. "You do. You always have and you always will. Because regardless of anything that's happened in the past, I'm still in love with you. So tell me, Hinamori, do you love me?"

"I…" you began as you took a deep breath. "I don't…"

 _I see_ I thought to myself with a sad smile on my face. _Well, I guess that's to be expected. I mean, it's not like she can just change how she's seen me for years in the span of a few weeks. So I guess I'll just have to accept-"_

"... But I think I could, given time." you finished as you smiled at me with a million emotions spread across your face. "So, Hitsugaya-kun, if you're willing to wait…Then I… I..."

"Hinamori, I've been waiting for you my entire life." I said as I took your hands in my own. "In fact, I'd say that I've gotten pretty good at it over the years. So believe me when I say that waiting is not an issue when it comes to you. I'd wait for the rest of forever if I had to… Because I love you, Hinamori. I always have… and I always will."

"S-Shiro-chan…. I…" you began through a tearful smile. "I don't know what to say…"

"You don't need to say anything, Hinamori" I replied as I let go of your hand to wipe the tears from your beautiful smile. "You don't need to say anything at all…"

* * *

 _And so, from that day onward…._

 _Well, you know the rest._

* * *

 **And there you have it, the final two segments of _To Be With You_!**

 **As happy as I am to have finally finished this story, I'm also kind of sad that it's really over...**

 **But I guess that just leaves room for future stories and future advantures, wouldn't you agree?**

 **So, for the last time, thank you for reading and thank you for reviewing.**

 **~ H-Mira**


	16. Chapter 16: Epilogue

Chapter 16: Epilogue

Looking up at the through the window once again, I can see that the sun has managed to completely dominate the morning sky.

Well, there's no point in delaying it any further. I might as well get up.

Gently removing her hand from my chest, I slowly and quietly stand up. As cheerful as she may be during the day, she definitely does _not_ have the same attitude when woken up early.

I quickly managed to change into my day robes and haori without making a sound. Pretty amazing, really, seeing as she has a habit of leaving leaving all sorts of objects scattered across the room.

Yet, just as I'm about to make my tactful escape out of the room, a voice stops me.

"I love you, Hitsugaya-kun" I hear her grudgingly mutter as she's half asleep.

And, with a smile on my face that will last through the day, I leave the room.


End file.
